Quotes

I love quotes. I use them when I lecture. Sometimes, one quote speaks paragraphs. I find it amazing that some of the quotes I use the most, were said a few hundred years ago. It shows that human behavior has not really changed that much. We may have more technology, but what is hard wired into our soul is the same as it was when we were created. When I hear a quote that means something to me, I write it down and look at it often. This morning I am sharing two that I find very meaningful:

• People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. -Maya Angelou
• The first great rule in life is to put up with things; the second is to refuse to put up with things; and the third, and hardest, is to be able to distinguish between the first two. - Sydney J. Harris

It Is What It Is

There is a saying, "It is what it is". I have added a few words to it. I say, "It is what it is and you just move on". The moving on part is important. I mean that whatever the situation is, if you dwell on it, you will never get past it. Nothing is forever, not even our problems. Just as good times do not last, neither do bad times. Sometimes we just need to ride the wave until we get to the shore. In the end, there is always solid ground.

Winding Down

I woke up this morning to a grey sky. It almost looks like winter. If I did not see the thermometer hanging on my backyard tree, reading 70 degrees, I would think it was winter. The summer is winding down. This is the last day I go to work before Labor Day, the unofficial end of summer. I am looking forward to Autumn. I am ready to put the summer of 2013 behind me.

Belly Full Of Bison

A new hamburger restaurant opened near my office. The menu is four pages long and takes more time to digest than the meal. The name is BareBurger, but the burgers are far from bare. Yesterday I did more work thinking of what to order than I did attending to patients. As each doctor walked in, we sat them down with the menu and had them write their order. You choose a protein, roll, cheese and toppings. The protein choices are beef, chicken, turkey, elk, wild boar, bison, ostrich, quinoa or black bean. I decided to do a three way split with my coworkers and have more taste choices. We ordered bison, turkey and portobello mushroom burgers on multi grain, brioche and tapioca rice rolls, with smoked mozzarella, blue and colby jack cheeses. We added on fried onions, raw onions, avocado, lettuce, tomato, garlic dill pickle slices and sauces. Sweet potato fries were a must. Each person paid almost $16 for this treat. Once a month we will allow this in our lunch budgets. This was the first time I had bison and I enjoyed it. It was a cross between the flavors of beef and lamb. I was so full that I never ate dinner.

Heads Up

As I was sitting in the hospital lobby last week, I noticed that people wear many types of head coverings. Most had a meaning attached to them. Since I had hours to spare, I decided to play a game and try to notice as many different types as I could. First, I saw a hospital worker in his scrubs, wearing a cloth OR type of hat.  I could figure out that he was responsible for some type of patient care. Next, I saw a woman with a shower cap type of hat. She was a food service worker. Next I saw a man with a bike helmet. He was delivering Chinese food. Then, I saw a man with a yarmulke. Since he had a stethoscope around his neck, I surmised that he was a doctor. I also saw turbans, baseball caps, grandpa hats, motorcycle helmets, head scarves and wigs. I never really paid much attention to what someone is wearing on their head, but each item held a meaning and was an important part of that person's daily life. Sometimes we just need to take a moment and notice the small things.

Disabled?

I was in 7-11 yesterday morning buying my lotto tickets. Ahead of me on line was a boy, around 20 years old. He seemed a bit mentally disabled by the way he spoke to the clerk. He spoke very slowly almost thinking about each word before he said it. He was with a crew of workmen and must have been starting his workday. After he paid, he must have realized that he left his wallet home. He took out his cell phone and called his house. Since I was standing on line waiting to pay, I overheard the entire conversation. This is what he said: "Hi Dad. Did I wake you? You sound a little tired. Did you sleep ok? I think I left my wallet at home. If you have a minute could you please look for it. Dad, if you are tired, you don't have to do it now. Only if you have a minute." Then I heard him say, " Thank you, Dad. Have a good day. I love you". The boy spoke so kindly and respectfully to his father. It was the nicest parent/child conversation I have heard in a long time. When I think of how most teenagers speak to their parents, it makes me think. Who really has the disability?

Don't Speak

After having a cold for one week, it finally settled in my throat. For the first time in many years, I got laryngitis. I had no voice. Literally and figuratively speaking. As usual, on a Saturday in the summer, I go to the town pool to spend the day with friends. Everyone sits and talks all day. Yesterday, I was only able to sit and listen. Every time I had something to add to the conversation, all that came out of my mouth was a high pitched squeak. It was almost inaudible, so most of the time no one knew I was trying to add to the conversation. I felt invisible. I finally gave up and just sat quietly. It was not easy to do. This morning, my voice is a bit better. I don't like being silent.

Words Offend

Late Thursday evening, I received a message from one of my night receptionists. She is an older woman and this is a part time job after she retired as a school secretary. She said she was giving two weeks notice and that the job was not good for her anymore. Her husband has been sick lately, so I understood why she was leaving. It turns out that her sick husband was not the reason. Early Friday morning, my daytime receptionist called me, quite upset. It seems there had been an argument the evening before and that is why the other woman quit. This is what took place. Wednesday afternoon, my boss was looking for an important file. No one knew where it was. She called the doctor whose patient it was and the doctor said she handed the file to the night receptionists. They said they had no idea where it was. The doctor was very angry. The next morning, she called my day receptionist and told her the chart was missing. She looked through every file and found it. It was filed in someone else's slot. When the two night receptionist came in Thursday evening, the day receptionist said, "Who am I going to beat up? The chart was filed in the wrong slot and it took me an hour to find it". The younger receptionist laughed, as she knew the day receptionist was kidding. The older woman took offense and said she would not be spoken to in that manner. The day receptionist said she was only kidding, but these errors happen frequently and they become her problem to fix. Words went back and forth and later that evening I received the message of resignation. My day receptionist felt so bad and must have called me ten times on Friday. I explained to her that what one person thinks is a joke, another person doesn't. I always use the saying, "It is only a joke if both people laugh".

Kind Word

A kind word goes a long way. I always knew that but it was reinforced yesterday. I sat for 7 hours in three different hospital waiting rooms. My father's surgery went well and he was able to go home and sprint up the front steps. He did better than most 50 year olds. Each hospital staff member I encountered was so kind and caring. It started with the housekeeping staff. I watched as worker, Carlos,  meticulously scrubbed down a gurney. He saw me watching and stopped to talk. He said, " I wash the gurney very well, because maybe one day I will be a patient in it". We chatted a bit and he told me about how he loves working at the hospital. As it turns out, when my father left the hospital this man walked him to the car and settled him in. He hugged my father as we left. The next encounter was in the holding area. A nurse named Theresa came over to tell my mother how beautiful she was and how pretty her outfit was. She remembered my mother from the previous week's surgery. She was from Trinidad and kept referring to my mother as "beautiful mama", in her wonderfully lilting accent. In the recovery room, we met Kate. She came over to me and addressed me by name even though no one knew my name. She said she remembered my parents talking about me the previous week and asked how my sister was, also by her name. When I told Theresa how good she made us feel, she said something similar to Carlos, in housekeeping. She said,"We are people too, and one day we might be a patient here. We treat you as we would want to be treated". Thank you, the staff of Beth Israel Hospital, for all that you did for my family. 

Stretched

As if the summer wasn't hard enough, I just found out that my father needs another surgery and the date was bumped from next Thursday to today. Plans had to be rearranged, doctor appointments rescheduled and a day off from work. All of this is done with the warmest heart, as there is nothing in the world I would not do for my parents. I usually do well with spur of the moment changes, but this one blindsided me. On top of all this, I am getting over a cold and have not slept for 2 days. Just yesterday, one of my doctors told me the origin of the term Murphy's Law. Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. Although in this case nothing is really wrong, it still is not right. I have packed a cooler bag with breakfast and lunch for my mother and me and hopefully the surgery will be over quicker than last weeks. After I tuck my parents safely back at home, I will be babysitting my grandson until 10pm. I am thinking of changing my name to Taffy. I am being stretched very thin and hope I do not snap.

Trespasser

I woke up yesterday morning to a trespasser on my email. For some reason, Yahoo thought it would be okay to have ads placed onto my inbox page. It took me quite a while to figure out how to opt out of this intrusion and some of the ad companies have no opt out choice. Who gave Yahoo the right to blatantly put ads onto an account that I thought was private? With all of the privacy issues and disclaimers that have now become part of our daily lives, how was this allowed to happen? There was even an explanation of how these ads were specially tailored to my demographics. Whose business is it how old I am or if I am male or female. Again, I thought that this info was private. Obviously, we were all lied to. I feel like my security has been compromised and I am not happy about it. Yahoo has become boohoo.

Easy Rider

Today at work, we are having a pizza party for one of my receptionists who is leaving after six years. I called the Italian restaurant down the block to order 2 pizzas. I wanted one regular sicilian pie and one chicken parmesan sicilian pie. The girl that took the order said they do not make a chicken parm sicilian pizza. I asked if they make a chicken parm regular pie. She said yes. I asked if they make a regular sicilian pie and she said yes. I asked why she could not make a chicken parm sicilian pie. She said she couldn't. Now, I started to order like Jack Nicholson, in the movie Easy Rider, when he wanted an egg salad sandwich on white toast. I said, "Make a round pie, with thick crust, add the chicken parm and then shape it into a square". She said, "Ok". I had her read the order back to me before I hung up. She read, "One regular sicilian pizza and one regular round pie, thick crust with chicken parm, shaped into a square". The order arrives at noon. I can't wait to see what I get.

What If

There are two types of people. They are the "what if's" and the "don't worry's". The "what if's" worry and the "don't worry's" don't care "if". I was brought up to be a "what if" and I have passed that mindset down to my children. A "what if" will think of a situation from every angle. We make contingency plans. We cover every variable that can go wrong. Since I am not a psychic, I cannot look into the future and know that everything will be fine. That is why I make plans. The "don't worry's" may not always have problems, but somewhere along they way, they realize that they needed to plan better. Now, I will get to the point of this blog. Yesterday my son made a big backyard party. The weather forecast all week was for a mostly sunny day. He thought to himself "what if it rains"? Everyone told him "don't worry". He decided to go with the "what if" theory and buy two tents. The tents would cover 200 square feet of his patio. Enough coverage to seat 40 people under it. Guess what? In the middle of the party, it rained. No one even noticed because we were all seated under the tent, eating and talking. "What if" he didn't have the tents?

Party Day

This morning we will set up my son's backyard for a 30th birthday party. My daughter in law looks more like 18, but tomorrow she will turn 30. We will be erecting tents and setting up tables and chairs to look like an outdoor venue. The weather is a cloudy, sunny mix and I hope it does not rain. My daughter in law has looked forward to this party for months and I know that her expectations will be met. All of her family and friends will be there. I will put on my cordial happy face when I say hello to some of them. There are a few sour grapes in the bunch that I will try to avoid. The food will be catered in from a wonderful Italian restaurant and some of the "mavins" will like it and some will not. They will compare it to their own home cooking and rate the sauce. My theory is "it's free food, so eat it and keep your comments to yourself". If you cannot do that, then stuff up on the chips and leave more food for others. She deserves a beautiful party, a happy birthday and a wonderful life.

Tables and Chairs

It takes a village to have a party. Specifically, if you want your guests to sit down. Throughout the years, one thing has remained the same when I entertain. The big question is, "Do we have enough tables and chairs?" The next big question is, "Who can we borrow from"?  My daughter in law is turning 30. She has planned a big outdoor party for this occasion since she moved into her house. The party is Sunday and yesterday my son started the "chair hunt". He got tables from his in laws. He got tables and chairs from me. This morning he is getting tables and chairs from my sister. The rule is that each item has to be labeled with the owners name so that at the end of the party there is not a mix up. According to his calculations, everyone should have a seat. If not, he has brick steps.

Smiley Face

For many reasons, this has not been the greatest summer. It felt different. It did not have that happy summertime feeling. Family members have not been feeling well, so how could summer be carefree and happy? It is time for a smiley face. That is what I do when things seem bad. I look at my calendar until I am drawn to a date. That will be the day when everything will be good again. I put a smiley face on that date and turn back to today's date. The last time I put a smiley face on the calendar was May 20. My daughter in law had a rough pregnancy and I told her that she would be fine and smiling on May 20. We never expected a premature baby and while he was due June 15, he was born on April 18 and he came home May 20. Coincidence or prophetic? This morning I am putting 3 smiley faces on my calendar for three people that are important to me. When we reach those dates, things will be well again.

Have It My Way

While driving home from Cape Cod, I made a rest stop in Mystic, Connecticut. It was lunchtime, so I went to the counter to order some food. I ordered one hamburger from the dollar menu, one 4 piece chicken McNuggets from the dollar menu, one small fries from the dollar menu and a small chocolate shake. The cashier says, "That will be $10.43". I said that I ordered 4 items from the dollar menu, so it would be $4.32, give or take a few pennies for tax. She said the shake was $2.29. I said that would make the order about $5.60. She said it would be $7.43. I said the price was wrong. We agreed upon a little less than $6 and then she rang up a sale for $8.43. I said she did it wrong and she agreed. I gave her a $20 bill and she gave me change of $13.50. By now I didn't care if I overpaid because I was hungry and tired and just wanted to go home. She started to put the order on the tray and she places a Happy Meal down alongside the bag with the hamburger, fries and shake. I said that I did not order a Happy Meal. She agreed and said she would "get the rest of the order". She returned with another 4 piece chicken McNuggets, placed it on the tray next to the Happy Meal (that I never ordered) and pushed it towards me and said, "Here is your order". I gave up and took the Happy Meal and all of the other items and sat down to eat. I am now the proud owner of a Smurf action figure.

A Gift

This morning I will be heading home to New York. I hope the ride back goes as quickly as the ride here. I did everything on my list and more. Since it rained most of yesterday, we took a 2 hour train ride to the end of the Cape. We saw cranberry bogs and historical sights. It was the baby's first train ride and she stared out the window in amazement. She is a happy girl and adjusts to every situation, After the ride, we spent the afternoon at the indoor pool. She learned that splashing is a lot of fun. We went to an early dinner because all  4 grandparents were going to babysit while her parents went out to have an anniversary dinner. As they left, we all looked at each other and hoped for the best. Just as expected, our baby played for a bit, then fell asleep in grandma's arms. She slept soundly until her parents returned. She is a real gift and made this weekend another fond memory.

The Cape

After a 5 hour trip, we arrived at the Cape yesterday afternoon. The ride was a smooth one, but the last 3 miles had us going in circles. The GPS never got online and it was a good thing I printed out the MapQuest directions. As soon as we arrived, we jumped into our bathing suits and went to the pool to see our granddaughter. She looked at us as if she sort of recognized our faces. I guess without a computer screen framing our faces (Skype) she was confused. We swam and played in the sand until dinner time. We then drove 40 minutes to eat "the best lobster rolls" in New England. Too bad 500 other people also did that. We waited one hour and the food was as good as promised. We then went to "Sundae School" for ice cream cones. The baby was so good and smiled and babbled through it all. Even though they say rain for today, it is sunny and beautiful. I can't wait to see our little "doll" at breakfast.

The Cape

This morning I am leaving for Cape Cod. It should take between 4 to 5 hours to get there depending on the traffic. It will be a well needed rest. My son planned this trip to be a special visit. Today is his 7th wedding anniversary. The years flew by. He wanted to spend this day with the people that mean the most to him. They are his wife, his daughter, his parents and his in-laws. My son is not the type that says much, but when he talks we all listen. He has a wonderful heart and is just an overall good person. When he planned this vacation he had no idea that I would need it so badly. The last few weeks have been upsetting, but now things are looking up. I can't wait to get there.

Sleeping Baby

Last night we went out to dinner with my son, his wife and their baby. They had been out all day and the baby was tired. We put him into his stroller and went to Friendly's for sandwiches and ice cream. He is a good baby and will sleep through mostly anything. He was sound asleep when all of a sudden the staff came out clapping and singing Happy Birthday to someone at the next table. The baby got so startled he began to scream. After a few minutes he calmed down and went back to sleep. That is when the staff came out again clapping and singing Happy Birthday to someone at the other table next to us. Again, the baby was startled and began to cry. By that time there was no consoling him and we just kept passing him around the table so the next person could eat. I guess that sleeping babies and happy birthdays do not always mix.

Deep Sleep

I am not the best sleeper. If I get 3 solid hours a night, I am lucky. This has been my pattern for 30 years. I was blessed with children that never slept more than 3 hours at a time, so my body is trained to think that three hours is a full night's sleep. After having a few weeks of worrying about my father, I found that I was sleeping less than my usual amount which really means not sleeping at all. Last night, after tossing and turning, I decided to do something I rarely do. I took 1/2 of an Ambien. I must have fallen asleep pretty quickly. I am a noisy sleeper. Not from snoring, but from jewelry. I sleep with 2 charm bracelets, filled with charms. I am always "clinking" when I walk and when I sleep. I never take off these bracelets and have even tightened the locks so they cannot fall off by themselves. One bracelet is so hard to take off that I have to slowly push it off of my hand centimeter by centimeter until it is pried off. I only have to do this if I have a medical test that requires no metal. I woke up this morning and my bracelet was off my hand. It was neatly placed on my nightstand. I must have done this while in a deep sleep because I would never have removed it otherwise. I find it very scary that I could do something that took so much coordination and effort and not even know that I did it. I will not be taking an Ambien again. Who knows, I could wind up in Mexico.

Rude and Crude

Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction. Yesterday, a man walked into my office. He was not one of our patients but he bolted up to the front window. The man was well dressed and looked about 60 years old. My receptionist was entering a medical claim and finished typing the last line before she looked up. It took about 10 seconds. As soon as she looked up, the man started yelling at her. He was screaming at a very high pitch, saying that she was rude by not immediately acknowledging him. He said that he expected that from the younger generation but not from someone her age. She is over 55. We all stood there, not saying a word, as the man was being irrational. Then, he asked what floor suite 202 was on. Really? We never answered him and he stormed out the door still mumbling about our rudeness. He was not one of our patients. I think he should be.

Heritage

Since my grandchildren were born, I have wanted to create a family history for them. I am lucky enough to have my parents still alive and they are helping me fill in the blanks. If I do not gather this information now, it will be lost forever. Through my research, I have found out a lot about my great grandparents. I know when they arrived in America and who lived in their home as far back as 1910. I have learned what their occupations were. I have learned what towns they came from and when they became naturalized citizens. Certain information that we thought we knew, was incorrect. I am trying to put the pieces together while I still can. It takes time, but it will be well worth it. Family history is important, even though it doesn't really change a thing.

Three People

Many years ago, a coworker said to me, "If three people say you're a horse...saddle up". I thought the expression was funny, but 30 years later, it still holds true. If you think of the real meaning, it pertains to almost everyone. It is telling us to look at things closely and not to be stubborn. Sometimes we do not see the things that outsiders do. It can be tough to look a some situations and see what they really are. If people around you all disagree with what you are saying or doing, maybe there is something wrong. Opening our eyes to the truth may not be easy, but in the long run it is beneficial.

Postman Part Deux

After making a small scene at the post office the other day, it seems that the postal supervisor (who I thought was the postmaster) got scared. He did some research and realized that he made a huge mistake. It seems that an elderly man walked into the post office with a letter that had been delivered to him by error. He said that no one by that name (my name) lived at his address. The supervisor, henceforth to be known as the "stupid-visor", decided to put a stop on all of my mail and mark it return to sender. This all happened 19 days ago. When the stupid-visor found his error, he "tried to call me" but couldn't find where I lived. Yes... the postal stupid-visor DIDN'T KNOW WHERE I LIVED. Maybe if he looked at my address, he would have figured it out. So, he put the problem aside and continued on his merry way. Today, when the regular mailman came to "not deliver" my mail, he informed me that there was a stop mail order on my address. By this time I had already spoken to the Federal Postal Inspector and he had called my local post office to reprimand them and to ask what was going on there .So, here I was again, at the post office, but now I was demanding a letter of apology, a letter to all of my creditors stating that the post office made an error and rerouted my mail and a request to see the Postmaster. After being told that the Postmaster was not available, I asked for her direct telephone number, as I was going to speak to her by the end of today. The stupid-visor finally said to wait a minute and he directed me to the Postmaster's office. As I entered the office, there was a nice woman who looked like she was embarrassed about her worker's incompetence. She apologized profusely, wrote a letter of apology, undid the stop mail order and gave me her business card if any other problems occurred. Now all I have to do is wait 3 weeks for my returned mail to get to me again, that is, after I call every company to alert them that I still live at my address. 

The Hill

In my mind I am comparing this summer to a hill. Today I am standing at the top, ready to coast down. The trip up the hill was a bit hard. I trudged and slowly made it up. At some points I just had to stop and take a deep breath, because if I didn't I would not have been able to push on. The top of the hill looked so far away that I never thought I would reach the peak, but I did. I got to the top and saw that there is beauty in everything if you just continue along the trip. I am now starting the trip down and hope to find easier terrain when I reach flat ground. At the bottom of my hill will be the beginning of a journey that I know I am now ready for.

28,900

I never look at statistics but for some reason I just did. So far this blog has had 28,900 reads. I only know of about 6 people that read it, so the rest are strangers. They live all over the United States and in many foreign countries. Sometimes I have to look on the world map to see where the towns are from. I have learned more about geography in the past two years than I have in the previous 55. I am still amazed that people find my writing interesting enough to return to read it more than once. This blog is only a compilation of my daily life and thoughts. Some days I have more to say and others I have to think hard. Today's blog was going to be about my future niece's bridal shower, but somehow the even number of 28,900 caught my eye. It is a beautiful day outside, sixty degrees and sunny. The type of day you can only hope for when you plan a party. I am heading to the shore to a pub type restaurant for this celebration. I am looking forward to it as this has been a rough few weeks. Having a happy occasion is just what the doctor ordered.

The Mailman Never Rang

If I did not live this story, I would never believe it. I have been expecting a few pieces of mail that never arrived and last week I did not receive mail for two days. I went to the post office and asked to speak to the postmaster. The counter person rang a bell and a few minutes later he appeared at the window. I explained to him that I did not get my mail and that it was now 2 weeks overdue. He asked if it was "tracked" and I said that these were regular letters and those are never tracked. He said everyone should put tracking on all of their letters. I said that would be ridiculous as the price of a 46 cent letter would be about two dollars. He said if there is not tracking he would have no idea where my mail is. I said that one of the letters in question was brought into his post office and handed in to the counter person. The letter was remaining within the same town. He said that when it was brought into him, he sent it to a main hub and they send it back to him, to deliver to me. I said I never got it, so where is it? He said he had no idea. I asked if there are bins of undeliverable mail and he said, "No". At this point it was turning into a "Seinfeld" episode. I said, "You know how to take the mail, but you do not know how to deliver the mail". I turned to the 20 people on line waiting to mail their letters and said, "Are you all listening to this. The postmaster is saying that the mail you hand in now, might never get to its destination and if it doesn't, he will have no idea where it went". They all agreed that it was absurd that this is how the post office runs. I then took a blank envelope and "role played". I said, "Here is my letter. I am giving it to you. You are giving it to the main hub. If I never get it....where is it now? He repeated that it would be delivered. I said," I NEVER GOT IT. WHERE IS IT?" He said he had no idea. At that point, I asked for a postal inspectors name and number at the main hub. I want to see how high a person can get in the US Postal system, without having a brain.

Beautiful Day

I woke up this morning to a beautiful day. The sun is shining brightly and the temperature is warm but not hot. At this moment in time, all is right in my world. The people I love are all doing well and whatever problems I have are all in check. A life without problems is not really a life. The reality of living and loving, means that each day brings with it, a new adventure. Just like in the movies, it can be a comedy, a tragedy or a horror story. Sometime we have no choice but to be part of the show. The best we can do is hope for a happy ending.

All Bottled Up

When my children were babies there was only one kind of baby bottle. It came in 2 sizes, 4oz and 8oz. We put the formula in screwed on the nipple, turned it over and voila....food. Today there are too many choices. Each one has its own theory behind it. In the 1980's the theory was, "Here is your formula, drink it". Now the theories are for colic, for better feeding angles, for less stress and so on and so on. In the three months that my grandson has been eating, he has used three types of bottles. Each bottle has a few components to it and one has so many, it is like building an erector set. Last week I fed him with the "erector set" bottle. He sucked and sucked and sucked and only 1/2 ounce was gone. He usually eats his food in 5 minutes. After sucking for a few minutes, his eyes closed as if to say, "Enough already". After switching his position and turning the bottle in his mouth, he finally ate 2 of the 3 ounces. I decided it was enough as I was getting colicky. The same thing happened yesterday, but I responded differently. I got the old bottle out and poured the remaining formula into it and he ate in 2 minutes. Make it simple and the baby will respond better.