End Of Year

This is the last day of the year and I am glad to usher it out. It has not been the best of years and I hope 2016 will be better. I am glad to see the holiday season end. I am looking forward to seeing Valentine's candy in the dollar store next week. I never do anything special for New Years Eve. To me it is just another night. I cannot remember when I saw the ball drop last. All I know is that I go to sleep and wake up the next morning having to remember to date all paperwork with the new year. As I end the year, all I can do is wish for health and happiness for my family. I guess that is what everyone wants.

Reindeer Games

The holiday season is moving to a close. Ornaments will be taken down and packed away for the next year. Most ornaments are fine but there is one type that annoys me. It is the one that people put on their car to mimic reindeer antlers. I ride behind a car and it looks like someone has their arms out of the window waving. When I get close enough I realize that it is the dreaded antlers. Some people are not satisfied with only the antlers so they add the red nose to the front bumper. I avoid looking into to the car to see who the driver is for fear of spotting the Santa Claus hat. That would kick me over the edge.

Reply All

We all make blunders in life. Some you can fluff over. Others are not that easy to explain. Reply all is a very dangerous mistake. Last week one of my friends got an email that was also sent to five other people. She never looked to see who the people were. She wrote back and sent it reply all. The email had some derogatory remarks about one of the recipients. When she sent it reply all, that person saw what she wrote. Sparks flew. When all was said and done, two people are no longer on speaking terms. The moral of the story is to be careful before you hit the send button.

Bearer of Bad News

At one time in our lives, we must be the bearer of bad news. The way the news is presented to others is important. We need to be truthful but compassionate. We need to have the other person's best interests at heart before the news is shared. Depending on our relationship with the party the news is given to, the method must be well thought out. I teach in my workshop that words and tone, if used properly, make a world of difference to the thoughts we project.

Same Mold

Yesterday I was sitting in the hotel lobby waiting for my husband to come down for breakfast. I saw a man walking down the hall wearing a checked shirt, jeans and a bald head. I got up and walked towards him only to realize it was not my husband. It was a man about 10 years older. I sat down. A few minutes later I saw a man wearing a plaid shirt, jeans and a bald head walking towards me. I got up. It was not my husband. It was a man 10 years younger than him. Finally I saw a man walking towards me with a plaid shirt, jeans and a bald head. This time it was him. I looked around the breakfast area and every man there looked the same. Plaid shirt, jeans and close cut hair. The women all looked different with various styles of clothes and hairstyles. It was a funny sight.

123

This morning I will be driving home, waiting to return to New England in two weeks. Years ago when my son first moved here for college, it was so hard to say goodbye when I went home. I always cried. Then he got married so when I went home, I said goodbye to two people. It was harder. I still cried. Now I have a granddaughter so I say goodbye to three people. I cry more. Soon there will be four people. I look forward to more happy tears.

Happy Holiday

Today is Christmas. I do not celebrate the holiday but I celebrate with the people who do. In the past week I see people with the holiday spirit. They smile at you and wish you well. Last month no one did this. Next month no one will either. It is a bit sad that it takes a date on a calendar to make people have compassion and kindness. The good wishes of the holiday season need to be carried over for the other 364 days. I do not get carried away this time of year because I know that the people who wished each other health and happiness when they were on the long lines buying gifts will be the same ones cursing at each other on the long lines to return their gifts.

Ready To Go

We are packed and ready to make the second of our three trips to New England. This is my favorite time of year because I get to see my granddaughter every few weeks. My daughter in law's family celebrates Christmas Eve with Chinese food. I do not know how the tradition started but I like it. It seems like an offshoot of what Jewish people do on Christmas, just without a movie. We will open our Hanukkah gifts as they open their Christmas gifts. I will also receive my belated birthday gift. The best gift of all will be a hug from my cute little girl.

Silence of the Keys

I am not the type of person who loses things. I have a set place for everything. My keys, my coat, my purse. The other day my husband misplaced his keys. It was not like a cell phone that you could call to track down. It was not like a lost landline phone that you could locate through a sound. Keys are silent. After a while of searching, he found them inside a sneaker in the basement. He does not remember placing them there.

Happy Birthday To Me

Today is my birthday. I am 60 years old. I don't know how I got to this age as I do not feel old or think I look old. I have had a good life without many problems. It has not been perfect, but if I compared it to other people I am doing well. People have asked me what I want for this big birthday. I give the same answer to everyone. What I want, only God can give me. The things I wish for most are intangible and cannot be granted by humans. I want my family to be healthy. I want my family to be happy. I want to see the people I love have easy lives. I want to see a world that is not in chaos. I want to see everyone on earth spend their time here wisely. I don't care about shoes or handbags or the latest fashions. I never did. I just care about people's feelings. I don't know if I will get my birthday wish and if I don't I will not question it. There is always next year.

A Person First

Before anything else, we are a person first. Before we are a teacher, lawyer, doctor or any other profession. On Friday, I received a call from one of my doctors saying that a close friend of hers had died. She was distraught. She was sobbing and asked me if she could go home. She was scheduled for a few patients that day but was so upset she did not think that she could sit with them without crying. I told her to try to have another doctor fill in for her and if not just tell the patients that she was sorry for the inconvenience. She did that and the patients understood. Later that day, I received another call from that doctor telling me that our director contacted her to say that she was angry that the patients were cancelled. The doctor felt even worse now. I consoled her by saying that what she did was correct. If she could not be effective in giving therapy that day, what was the sense of having a session? I reminded her that before she was a doctor, she was a person and that always comes first.

Great Dinner

Last night I had my birthday dinner. It was as nice as expected. We went to a small neighborhood restaurant that I had to make a reservation for a week in advance. The service was a bit slow. There might have been an issue in the kitchen. Normally I do not care, but when you are with a toddler
every minute counts. The place was very loud which was great, because you could not hear my grandson. He was very well behaved, except for a few screams. When the food finally arrived, it was worth the wait. Everything was delicious. I had a hamburger, topped with pulled pork, served between bacon grilled cheese toasted bread. The order came with truffle oil parmesan french fries. I took half of it home. After dinner we had coffee and canoli cake at my house. This was the exact type of celebration that I wanted.

Dinner

Next week is my birthday. It is my 60th, although I do not feel any older than I did years ago. I guess they are right when they say it is only a number. I did not want to have a big party. That is just not me. I wanted to have a small dinner with the people that are closest to me. My son picked out the restaurant, one that I had never been to before. He thought that would be special. There will be eight people plus my grandson. I am looking forward to it.

Structure

Everyone needs structure. Structure is safe. Structure is less stressful. This week in my office, I am seeing how a lack of structure is leading to poor morale. I am in charge of the front staff. The lead doctor is in charge of the professional staff. There was never a clear plan as to what responsibilities the doctors have so it has become a a free for all. That is when I was asked to step in. I am the structure queen. I have begun to revamp the policies that were never really in place. I am setting guidelines and rules. Everyone will be clear as to what is needed to do. I spoke to each doctor to explain that things are changing and at first it may be upsetting, but after the routine is in place for a while they will settle in and things will run smoothly from then on. They all seemed relieved.

Positive Feedback

I have just sold a second item on eBay. My previous item was already delivered to the buyer and I was awaiting feedback. Since this was my first sale, I wanted to make sure that the person who bought it was as happy as I was to sell it. She was. I got a rave review. That is all anybody wants in life. Positive feedback. Whether it is in work, in what we wear, the food we cook or just being a good person. Positive feedback does not cost a penny but is worth a million.

Speaking My Mind

I always remember my mother telling me that the things she said at eighty years old could never have been said at sixty years old. You can get away with certain statements once you are old enough to not care. Yesterday I became old enough to not care. I always buy holiday gifts for certain doctors. My receptionist and I chip in. We get for five of the more established doctors, who give us gifts, and the three receptionists. This year without telling me, my friend gave to three of the newer doctors. Had she mentioned it, I would have chipped in too. She never told me what she was going to do, so I was blindsighted when three young doctors ran into the office to hug her and thank her. I was so embarrassed because it looked like I either forgot them or was just plain cheap. When the girls left the room, I asked my friend how she could do that to me. I never would have given any gifts to other people without telling her. She started to make excuses and that is when I told her to stop talking to me and get out of the room. I never speak like that, but that was how I felt, so I am now at the age where I do not have to hide it. I ignored her all day and I knew that I ruined the holiday party for her. Next time she will know to never go behind my back and do something that will make me look bad.

Holiday Party

It is time, once again, for the annual awkward holiday party. When I arrive at work this morning, I will start to set up the room. Each hour food will arrive. Since we have no kitchen and only a coffee nook area, everything will be cold. We will be treated to macaroni and cheese, spicy samosas, Turkish spinach pie, rice and beans, oxtail, meatballs, baked ziti, bagged salad and a few other surprises. I have chipped in for a platter of chicken wings. That should be tasty. We will fill our plates, take a seat, and sit silently staring into space. No one talks. After the awkwardness gets to be too much for me, I usually tell some funny story, so at least there is the sound of laughter in the room. Towards the middle of the party, the doctors begin to talk about their patients. They review strategies for treatment. That is when I pretend to hear the phone ringing and exit the room. I hover in the front office until it is time to go home.

Climate

I usually never watch the news. That is the best way to keep my blood pressure low. When I am out of town, my husband puts the news channel on as soon as he wakes up so I am forced to watch. Yesterday there was a news clip of Mr Obama. He was making a speech about how happy he was that a climate control bill had passed Congress. He said that the American people should be proud of this landmark bill. My blood began to boil. Climate control? What about the people all over the world being assassinated by terrorists? What about the fact the he does not have the strength to call a radical a radical. What about the fact that he is leading America down a treacherous path with his weakness and ignorant mindset? He is more concerned that the planet is 2 degrees warmer than it was ten years ago but unconcerned that fourteen families in California are mourning loved ones.

Little Lady

My granddaughter's party was wonderful, but not as wonderful as she is. When I arrived at her house she looked like a princess in her pink lacy skirt. She came to hug me and I noticed her tiny little hands. Her nails were polished a hot pink. This was not an ordinary manicure that her mother did. This was a professional one. I asked her who did her nails and she said that a lady did them. Her nails looked better than mine. Since she is now three, she had her first manicure. I have only had one manicure in my life and that was about 20 years ago. My granddaughter and I are now equal in our manicure experiences but I am sure she will exceed me soon. The party was a success and all of the children had fun. They did crafts and made gingerbread houses. Before I knew it, the party was over. This morning we will have a bagel breakfast with the family and then get on the road. I will be back to see them in 11 days!

She's Three

She is three! Today is my granddaughter's birthday. Three years have flown by. I had not seen her since the summer and she has grown up. My son and daughter in law looked wonderful as usual, but my granddaughter stole the show. She is a ball of energy and has a brightness about her that just makes you love her. Her hair is a silky golden blonde and her eyes sparkle as she speaks. She is at the age when she is aware that today is her birthday and she will be getting a lot of gifts. The dolls that I ordered for her online have not arrived yet, so I bought her a few extra gifts. She told me that she wanted a puzzle and coincidentally I bought her a few. The dolls might be her Christmas gift. I look at her and see my son. She truly warms my heart.

Birthday Weekend

This morning we are heading up to Massachusetts. It is our granddaughter's third birthday tomorrow and we never miss her party. I cannot believe how three years have flown by. She is now a beautiful, smart little girl. Tonight we will have dinner with her and my son and daughter in law. We love this alone time with them. Tomorrow, on her birthday, she will have a party with friends and family so we will not have her undivided attention. We always love December since we get to visit her twice. We will return in two weeks to spend the holidays with her.

Holiday Greetings

This is the time of year when people send out their holiday cards. Years ago, Jewish people did not do this. Now they have joined in. In the past, you had to go to a studio to have the pictures taken and printed. Now you can just upload them from your computer onto Snapfish or Shutterfly and create your own postcard. Over the years I have received many greetings. They have said, Merry Christmas, Merry Xmas, Happy New Year and Happy Holiday. This year my granddaughter sent out two cards with beautiful pictures. They had the best greeting of all. They said "Happy Everything".

First Sale

A few months ago I tried a new hobby. I started to make stained glass and mosaic pictures. After getting great reviews from friends and family, I began to make a few pieces to sell on eBay. I listed the items last week and within a few minutes people began to look at them. I had them on auction for seven days. Each day I looked to see if anyone was interested. Yesterday was the last day of the auction and one person bought my "Love" sign. I couldn't believe it. I sold something. Today I will pack it up and send it on its way to Ohio.

Stigma

I have always felt a stigma about taking medication to go to sleep.I usually do not sleep more than three hours a night. I guess my body is used to that. On Sunday night I never fell asleep. I looked at the clock every hour. When my alarm went off at 6am I got up and went to work. I decided that last night, I would finally give in and take a sleeping pill that my doctor had prescribed for me. I swallowed the tiny pill and went to bed at 9pm. This morning I woke up to the alarm clock at 6am. I actually slept through the night. I had not done this for 35 years. This is what most people must do every day. To be truthful, I do not feel any more rested than usual, but it made the night go by faster. I will now put this on my "occasional" list if I am ever up all night again.

Directions

Life runs easier when you read the directions. Most products that need assembly come with written instructions. I do not understand why people do not read them. By "people" I mainly mean men. Women are more practical and will invest the five minutes that are needed to understand what they need to do before they just jump in and start the project. Most men believe that their brains and intuition are better than that of the people that made the product. That is what accounts for backwards wheels and extra nuts and bolts. The lack of this skill starts in junior high school. If you did not read the entire chapter before you started to answer the questions, you spent an hour flipping back and forth to locate the line that had the answer. If you read the chapter first, you answered all the questions in 15 minutes and went outside to play.

Animal Shelter

Yesterday I went with a friend to the local animal shelter, North Shore Animal League, to adopt a puppy. This is a no kill shelter. I had never been to a shelter and did not know what to expect. I was pleasantly surprised. The building was new and each area was designated for the age of the pet. Older dogs were placed first, with the puppies being in the back. I guess this strategy allows every dog to be seen. The cages were all clean and there was no animal smell. All of the dogs in the shelter looked cleaned and groomed.  Pet stores have more of an odor. We woum
We wound ourselves to the back and I spotted a beautiful Golden Lab mix. She was 8 weeks old. We took her out of the cage and she was so sweet and playful. My friend decided that this was his puppy, so he started the adoption procedure. You have to fill out a long form and give references. My husband was listed as the first reference and they called him within the hour to validate the application. The whole procedure took about 4 hours but was well worth it. He brought the puppy home to begin a new chapter together. I named her Goldie. There is a saying about adopting a new pet from a shelter, "Who rescued who?"

Smiley Faces

I have a superstition. I am usually a concrete thinker but sometimes I resort to "magical thinking". I do this when I feel that I have no control over the situation. My superstition involves smiley faces. I choose a day on the calendar and draw a smiley face on it. Usually the date is months in advance. Some situations need time to straighten out. I just put a smiley face on June 1, 2016. My sister did this too. That is my target date for all things to be right. I know it makes no sense but neither does life. A few years ago, when my daughter in law was pregnant with my grandson, one screening test came out positive for deformities. My daughter in law was so upset. I took out my calendar and drew a smiley face on May 20, 2013. The baby was due June 15, 2013. I assured her that on May 20 she would be smiling. The test result turned out to be wrong but coincidentally the baby was born prematurely on April 18th. After spending a month in the NICU, he finally came home.....on May 20th. I stand by my smiley faces.

Take It From Here

This afternoon my sister comes home from Florida. She spent five days getting my parents back on their feet. If she had not gone down there, I think my father would have been in a hospital. She took charge and got him stabilized. She took him to the doctor, to dialysis twice and had two visits with a nutritionist. She cooked for them and shopped for them. She did everything in her power to get them going. I think she did a wonderful job. After today they will have to take the reigns and continue with the plan she set for them. Basically, it involves getting up, eating and walking. She knew it was time to leave when they said she was becoming annoying. That is a sign of their independence returning. Thanks, sis, I owe you one.

Pain Tolerance

I believe that women have a higher pain tolerance than men. That is why we are the ones to have the children. Yesterday my husband had a root canal procedure. It was his first. I have had four. He said that he needed me to take him there and wait for him. I left work, picked him up and took him to the dental office. He looked scared. I sat in the waiting room for about 1 1/2 hours until it was done. My husband walked out of the office and looked pale and shaky. He said he did not know how I had four root canals by myself. I told him that it was not a big deal. He thought that it was a "tough" thing to go through and he would not have been steady enough to drive himself home right after it. The doctor (a man) agreed. I told the doctor that I had two children without any pain killers so they both need to rethink the severity of a root canal.

Prayers

I have been praying for a few people this week. Two have had surgery. One will be having surgery. The other just needs to get back on his feet. The two that had surgery are on the mend and the future surgery will be early next year. My father is slowly getting back to himself after having some type of flu. I learned years ago that prayers need to be specific. I ask for what I want in detail. I try to cover all bases so there is no mistaking what I am asking for. I spoke to a family member in New England yesterday and she said that she does the same thing as sometimes when G-d answers prayers, it may not be exactly what we asked for. Twenty two years ago my mother in law prayed for something. Her husband was sick and she prayed to G-d to not make her a widow. He answered her prayer but in a different way. She died six weeks before her husband. She was 66 years old and never sick. She was never a widow.

Peace of Mind

My sister arrived in Florida and now I have peace of mind. She has taken charge and will set my parents back on the right path. She took my father to the doctor and other than a bad cold and lack of food, he is fine. Older people do not realize that if they do not eat, they will feel fatigued. I keep telling them that they have to treat food as if it is medicine. They would never think of skipping a dose of pills so why do they think they can skip a "dose" of food? She went food shopping for them and stocked their pantry. Today she will cook food for them. According to her, "rehab" starts this morning. Eating, walking and getting strong.