Cold and Colder

It is the Arctic freeze outside. Shelby needs to have a jacket on to walk in the backyard. It has been days since it has been above freezing. Tonight, thousands of people will be standing in Times Square shivering. Young girls in mini skirts and heels will have their legs turn red as they try to look their New Year's best. I have been dressed in layers since last week. I feel like a stuffed sausage and can barely lift my arms up. They say by next Monday things will ease up.

Bed and Breakfast

Whenever I go to visit my children, I stay in a Marriott hotel that offers a nice breakfast included in the price. As the years go by they add more to the buffet. My routine is to get up, get dressed and go down to the lobby to eat. Recently, the dress code seems to be loosening up. People have been coming to the lobby in pajamas. Sleep clothes, flip flops and messy hair are showing up at the buffet line. For a lack of better words, it grosses me out. If I can get washed and look presentable, so can you. What's next, a towel wrapped around your waist and wet hair?

The Avatar

Yesterday I interviewed an Avatar. I do not think she was human. Her first interview was with one of the doctors and her opinion was that the girl was nervous and maybe that was why she was so stiff. I saw her yesterday and she had not loosened up. She sat there, lifeless as a doll with no facial expression. I told her that the job description was for someone that needed to be warm and friendly at the front desk window. She looked at me blankly and said, "It is very important to be friendly". Her face never cracked a smile. After she saw me, she was interviewed by the new doctor, the one who she would be assisting. The doctor was the one that said she seemed like an Avatar or some other type of robot. If this was the personality she had to get a job, I am afraid how she will act if she got it.

Efficient Hours

The best way to have something run efficiently is to do the job and make decisions based upon your findings. In my office, my boss likes to do the reverse. We have a job opening for a work load that starts in the early morning and must be attended to immediately. The administrative doctor and I decided to make the hours 11am-4pm which would cover most of the day. My boss decided to make the hours 3pm-8pm. That makes no sense. If a patient needs to change their appointment time for that day, by the time the worker comes in, the appointment time has passed. If a patient needs their medication, they would need to go to pick it up in the evening, when it will be called in. There is no rationality to her thinking. Since I turned 62, I have a relaxed attitude with my job. If that is what she wants, that is what she gets. When problems arise, I will look at her with a smirk on my face and ask he how she wants the problem solved. This all reverts back to "Smart vs Bright".

What Were They Thinking

As I drove down I-95 yesterday it was smooth sailing until we got to a mall area. The traffic slowed to a crawl for a mile or two and then freed up again. It was the usual December 26 day of gift returning. The "what were they thinking" thoughts hanging in people's minds. About 60% of gifts are right on target. The rest break down like this: 15% are "Wow, I really love this. They thought out of the box and nailed it", 15% are "I guess they like these types of gifts so they though I would too" and the last 10% are the "WTF, why would they buy this for me? Now I have to go to the mall and wait on line to return it or get a gift card if I can't find the receipt." Before that is done, we all take a moment and think if there is any upcoming celebration so that we can pawn these gifts onto another person. Another happy holiday season.

Heading Home

After a wonderful weekend, we are heading home. I always feel a bit sad as I get so attached to my granddaughters, that I hate to leave. Most of my time here was spent like a playdate. We played with toys, did arts and crafts and jumped around doing "moves". My older granddaughter calls her made up acrobatic dances "moves". She has an unlimited amount of creative steps. My younger granddaughter has a permanent smile on her face. She giggled and smiled the entire time I was here. The time here was filled with hugs, kisses and pure joy. I haven't even left yet but I cannot wait to return.

Through A Child's Eyes

Christmas is not my holiday but as a grandparent I have adopted it. Before I had my grandchildren, I did not understand the fuss. Now I embrace it, not as a religious day but as a day of happiness and childlike wonder. Any day that makes a child happy is a good day. While most young children do not yet understand the concept of God and religion, they do understand a day of family festivities. Unwrapping a lot of gifts and eating delicious food with your whole family is all they focus on. That is how I see the holiday and am glad that I have the opportunity to broaden my horizons.

On The Road Again

Just like the Willie Nelson song, I am "On the road again". I just got up and am ready to take a ride to New England. The sun is shining and the weather is crisp and cold. At the end of the road, my children and granddaughter's are waiting. I cannot wait to arrive at their house and scoop the both of them up in my arms for a big hug and many kisses. This is what life is all about.

Birthday Gifts

For the past week, my sister has been asking me what I wanted for my birthday. We exchange a small token gift each year. It could be gloves, a kitchen utensil, a food container. It is something useful or just plain fun. This year I drew a blank as to what I wanted. In the past month, all of my needs have been met. I have the greatest gifts already. My parents are holding their own. My grandchildren are all healthy and happy. My soon to be born grandchild is still growing and is on the road to being full term. My sister is recovering from her surgery and is doing great. What more could I need? 

Officially Old

Today I am officially old. I have reached the age where I can collect Social Security benefits if I choose to. It snuck up on me. I knew that it was looming in the future, but the future came at a faster pace than I thought. In reality, age does not matter to me. My mind is young even though my back feels a bit creaky. Sixty two is the "take no more crap" age. If I am not happy at work, I can still collect money that I paid into the system. I do not have to worry about moving up the work ladder. I am on the highest rung and can now look down and laugh.

Bullying

It is tough to see someone being bullied. The new doctor is on a bullying rampage with her once beloved assistant. Her goal is to make her assistant walk out. We will not let that happen. Even though the assistant is 33 years old, her reaction to being bullied is as if she is 10 years old on the playground in school. Yesterday she sat there and cried as I patted her back and told her that things were going to be fine. My boss came in and told her the same thing and even though we were all giving her strategies to cope with a mean person, if something is not directly hurting you, you can never feel the pain. My boss keeps talking to the bully doctor but she just doesn't understand that she needs to control her mouth and her actions. She is a psychiatrist and if she doesn't know better, it is a sad commentary on that medical profession.

Want To vs Have To

Today I am bringing holiday gifts into work. In my mind they are separated out into two types of gifts. There are the "want to" gifts and the "have to" gifts. We all know what that means. The holiday season is meant to be kind and gift giving goes along with it. Thought is put into the gifts we give. When we are giving out of obligation, the thought process is giving any gift that can pass as nice without having any personal meaning. There will always be the extra gifts given to people that gave us a gift so we are forced to give one in return. Those gifts fall into the "have to but really didn't want to" sub division.

Hiring

We are hiring a receptionist again. This time, even though I am involved in the process, I do not care. As usual, applicants do not show up for the interview. The pool of people do not even have the experience we need. The salary we are offering is just above minimum wage. No one wants the job with the responsibilities that come along with it. Years ago it mattered to me. Now I am ambivalent. Whomever they hire will eventually become unhappy as they will be working with a crazy doctor.

PHD Of Lies

In some point in everyone's life we all have lied. We all have reasons for our lies. I call it the PhD of lies. The P is a protective lie. It is meant to protect someone from bad news until you feel it is the right time. The H is a hurtful lie. It is meant to do damage to another person. The D is a deceitful lie. It is meant to be sneaky and try to put something over on another person. I am a protective liar. If I have to lie, it is to shelter someone I love from heartache. It is meant to bide my time until I feel they are ready to know the truth. It is a judgement call of kindness and I see nothing wrong with that.

Sunshine

I woke up this morning to another cloudy day. I laid in bed looking out of the window and looked at the gray sky. I did not want to even get up. The day looked so sad. Then from the corner of my eye, I saw a patch of blue sky with the sun trying to pop through. Within an instant I wanted to get out of bed and start the day. The sunshine made the difference. It gave me the energy to get up and go. I can understand people that have seasonal depression. Too many cloudy days are not good for anyone.

Distracted

Everywhere I go, people are distracted. They sit in waiting rooms looking down at their phones. They walk in the street not even focusing on where they are. They are in a restaurant with other people and their attention is not with the live people in front of them, but with the virtual people in their phone. Real time experiences no longer matter. Pings, beeps, ringtones and video messages are the reality. I was at a doctor's office last week and three friends sat in a line next to each other. They were all texting, scrolling and trying to have a conversation with each other. No one ever looked up. The emotion was not there. For all I know, they might have also been texting each other.

Tables Turned

Tables turn when least expected. I never saw it coming. The new doctor has turned on her beloved assistant. Last year when the doctor arrived, she upset the apple cart. She carried on until we hired her old assistant and we did. After a few months, the assistant became a well like employee of our office. That is when things turned real ugly. It is like the old rule that you never have a child's play date with three children. One will always be unhappy. The doctor felt that her assistant being included as a friend in the office meant that she was no longer 100% devoted to her. Now things got nasty. The mean emails, cruel demands and nasty overtones began to appear. The assistant is now so upset that she wants to walk out. The problem is that we all like her so much we do not want her to leave us.

Privacy

We all like our privacy, but sometimes due to circumstances it needs to be invaded. It might not be what you want but it is what you need. As senior citizens age, their ability to be self sufficient dwindles. At some point, a healthcare aide is necessary. They never think it is. They see it as a sign of defeat. They never see it as a sign of caring. My circle of friends all have the same problem when an aide is hired. People that have never complained become complainers but what they are unhappy with is minutia. The story is always the same. The aide reads, she watched television, she talks on the phone and she eats our food. These are not offenses, they are normal activities. What are the aides expected to do all day? The majority of them are kind and caring and have the patience of a saint. I sometimes feel that I am losing patience and I love my parents more than anyone.

Missing Item

It has happened again. I am missing an item from the supermarket. I know I put it onto the conveyor belt to be checked out but it did not come home with me. I cannot locate the receipt so I do not know if I paid for it or it became part of the next person's order. I checked my car trunk to see if it got out of the bag, but it did not. I really wanted that item. I even went back to the aisle to get it at the end of shopping. It was not a necessary item, it was one that I wanted to try for the first time. If I find the receipt and I did pay for it, I will go back to the store and ask for another one.

Five

Today is my granddaughter's fifth birthday. She was born on 12/12/12, a special date for a very special girl. She is not only smart, she is wise. After being with her this weekend, I see that she has a concept of the world that is not common for a five year old. She understands. I do not mean the simple things, I mean the broader things. She can process things and explain it back to you in such a precise way that it makes sense to an adult. Certain statements that she makes have become a staple in my vocabulary and I use them often. If she is this astute at five years old, I cannot wait until she is ten. Happy Birthday to the most wonderful girl in the world!

Missing Piece

I am home from New England and had such a nice time. Things are almost back to normal with one exception. Shelby is still boarded at the vet. He is the missing link. Waking up without him feels strange. I am so used to taking care of him in the morning that I do not know what to do with my extra time. He is such a strong presence in the house that when he is not here there is a void. He will be home this afternoon and then all of the puzzle pieces will be back together.

Party Extras

My granddaughter's party was wonderful. As usual there was a lot of great food and desserts. The company is always delightful. This year I had an extra treat. After everyone had left, I was assigned the task of bathing the girls. Each girl had her own bathtime, which made it double the fun. They swam in the water and played with their toys. There is nothing more fun than watching children splash around in a bathtub with big smiles on their faces. After bathtime, I dressed them and combed their long hair. Since I had boys, I never combed long, silky hair. What a treat.

Playtime

I had the best time ever last night. I arrived at my son's house to find two beautiful girls waiting for me with big smiles on their faces. My son and daughter in law went out to dinner so I could have "alone time" with the girls. It was Grandma and Poppy time. We ate dinner together and then did arts and crafts. When it was bedtime for my younger granddaughter, she went to bed like a big girl. She did everything we asked without any fuss. Her big sister continued to play until her bedtime. We read books and had quiet time while she was laying in her pillow filled bed. It was such special quality time. As I walked out of my older granddaughter's room, she said, "Grandma, I wish you could stay here forever".

Birthday Weekend

In a little while we will be getting on the road to see my granddaughters for my oldest granddaughter's birthday. I can hardly believe that she is turning five. Although we have Skyped, we have not seen the girls in person since the summer. I am looking forward to some "girl time" with them. I am ready to play games and do anything else they want.

Non Confrontational

Sometimes it is not good to be non confrontational. When a situation affects you more than the other person and you stay silent to avoid conflict, no one wins. You lose because the situation does not change and the other person loses because you harbor ill feeling towards them. There is always a nice way to say what is on your mind and bothering you. Being honest while being kind can easily be done. All you need are the right words combined with the right tone. 

New and Improved

After a long day in surgery, my sister is now new and improved. All parts are working and it is now full steam ahead. The surgery went well and she even looked great right after it. We had been warned that she might look a bit grotesque and prepared ourselves for tha, but she looked as pretty as always. Today will start the recovery and healing process. By next week I am sure that she will be back to normal but at a slower speed and will work her way up to full throttle.

Waiting

This just might be the longest day of my life.......

Check List

I have a running check list in my head. It contains all of the things I need to.It scrolls all day eliminating the things I have done and adding on the new ones. It is a 24 list as it never sleeps. I wish it would take some time off and let my head rest.

Food Plan

Yesterday I ate dinner at a Chinese buffet. It was one of the best I had been to. I went in there with a strategy. Since I had been there before I knew the layout which was a big advantage. I decided on my "food plan" earlier in the day and went on the attack as soon as I arrived. I did a quadruple play and mixed things up a bit. I started with the veggies, cabbage, bok choy and okra. I am not usually a veggie person but the way they cook them is fantastic. After the veggies, I got one piece of each sushi choice which came out to be 18 pieces. Yes, eighteen choices of sushi. Mind boggling. After I was almost full, I rounded back to the delicious buttery veggies. I gave myself a few minutes to regroup and had jello, mango pudding, a rainbow cookie, butter pecan ice cream and a creamsicle.  I was at 100% full capacity but not overstuffed. It was great.

Refurbished

I took a chance and bought a refurbished laptop. I already have a desktop and a tablet so I was not in dire need of anything too crazy. After years of owning only Window's products, I decided to get a Mac. The prices of new ones were too high so I went with refurbished. It cost less than $150 and I am writing on it now. It is as fast as can be and I so happy with it. My travel laptop moves like a snail so now I can take this one on vacation. I think I did pretty well with this purchase.

Three C's

Day after day I am still reading about celebrities and media people who are being accused of misconduct. While I feel bad for the victims, they did have a way out. It was their choice to accept the bad behaviors of others. Most of us in their situation would have done the same as it is human nature not to rock the boat if we are afraid that we will be the one to fall off first. That is where the three C's come in. Comply, condone, complain. Since the beginning of time, women in Hollywood or the media knew that they had to comply with the shenanigans of male superiors or they would not advance in the industry. The men condoned the behavior because if they stood up to it they would look weak. After many years, all it took was one voice to complain loudly enough that they were heard. One was joined by two and three and four until a symphony began to sing. Now the cockroaches are scattering as the light is turned on.