Homing Pigeons

We are a technological civilization. We have turned over most of our basic daily thinking to computers. Our children no longer know how to add without the use of a calculator. If I give my parents a running list of numbers and ask them to tally them, they will have the answer in one minute. Bear in mind they are both 88 years old. Give this same list to a teenager and they will ask for a calculator. Go into a store and give the cashier $11 for a $6 order and they will think you have made an error. They do not realize that you want a five dollar bill back. We are old school. The same goes for directions. When I am asked if something is on the Northern or Southern side of the street, I know the answer. Nowadays without a GPS no one would know how to get home. Now I will get the point of this blog. Yesterday, I had to go pick up a new air conditioner. It was Memorial Day and I did not realize that there would be town parades closing the roads. After the air conditioner was loaded, the exit to the main street was blocked off. I was re routed down small unfamiliar roads. I do not have a GPS so I was on my own. I know East from West, so I just followed all roads West. I found my way home, just like a homing pigeon, in the same amount of time it would have normally taken. I hope I never lose my natural skills!

Heaven and Faith

I was saddened the other day when I found out that an acquaintance of mine was diagnosed with cancer. By the time the diagnosis was made, the prognosis was not good. He is a man that has always lead a good, clean life. Who knows why, or how, someone gets cancer. In this case it might have been 9/11, but no ones knows for sure. Once a diagnosis has been made and friends and family are notified, in a way, the grieving process begins. It is only normal to ponder "why him". What will happen to his family. How will life be, knowing that in the near future, a person will be missing from your life. We are a society of Faith and Religion. Whatever religion we choose to worship our G-d, we are worshiping the same entity. Our religion is either inherited or one we have chosen that  best suits us. If we are true believers, then we have to rely on our faith and be confident that when a loved one passes, they are going to a better place. Isn't that what Faith is all about? We spend our lives embracing  the concept of Heaven and a Better Place. But when reality hits home, it is a tough thought to bear. Death only effects the living. If we have true Faith, we should feel comforted by the belief that our loved ones will be well cared for in the Afterlife.

Helicopters

I hate the sound of helicopters. To me, that sound means trouble. This morning I was awakened by that unmistakeable roar. It is the heavy sound of a whirling motor, vibrating above your head. In my town, when you hear that noise, it means that a crime has occurred. Either a prisoner has escaped from the county jail, or a crime has taken place that needs the police to be overhead surveying the perimeter. When I was outside walking Shelby, I saw the helicopter hovering. Just frozen in the air, not moving. My daughter-in-law, who lives in the same town, texted me. She told me not to go to the shopping center, as a policeman had been shot early this morning. My stomach did a flip flop. I know the policemen in this town. I asked her if he was alive.She then responded that he was shot in the leg while doing a car stop. He will be OK. In reality, could anyone ever be OK after being shot? I will find out the details of what occurred later today but it is still unsettling. I hope I do not hear that sound again for a long time.

Big Brother

In 1948, George Orwell wrote a book titled 1984. When he wrote it, the year 1984 seem like an eternity away. It was based on the premise of "Big Brother". Big Brother was a form of government that watched over everything civilians did and they had to suffer the ramifications for their actions. In 2004 , Mark Zuckerberg invented Facebook. Society jumped on the idea. I do not think that anyone did, nor for that matter, does, realize that we have created a self imposed Big Brother. There is no privacy in the world. People post what they do, where they go and everything in between. Families have found out about pregnancies and divorces through Facebook. People have lost their jobs because of it, when pictures that are no ones business are posted and viewed by the wrong people. Have we become a society where "curiosity killed the cat". I am one of the few people that never joined Facebook. My personal life is just that.... personal. I have no curiosity about the nameless, faceless, millions that are linked to each other by the premise of being a friend. If someone has 500 friends, it is about 493 too many. We have compromised ourselves in the worst way and are too absorbed in other people's business to realize it. If you are on Facebook, remember, Big Brother is ALWAYS watching.

Gotcha!

You can run, but you can't hide. Eventually, I will catch up with you. I try to run my office efficiently and collect the fees at the time of service. Usually I have no problem but sometimes people are just deadbeats. I call and mail bills but I am ignored. That's OK. I will deal with them in the future. I never send anyone to collection. I do not think it is fair to ruin someones credit for a few hundred dollars. I would rather wait it out. Most times things come full circle. This happened yesterday. I got a call from a former patient that wanted to come back and see the doctor. I looked up his name and could not find him.I went into our old computer system and there he was. Last seem in 2002. I informed him that he has owed us $134 since 2002. Somehow he didn't seem to remember this bit of information. I told him that his account was locked out until the payment was made. He immediately gave me his credit card number and I cleared his account. I also informed him that he had to be credit card on file for any future appointments as I would never again wait for payment. He had no choice but to agree. It took ten years but ....gotcha.

Times They Are A Changing

Years ago I read a quote from a very famous man. He said something to the effect of "the youth of our times does not honor the values of their parents. They are wild and unruly and have no respect for their elders". This quote is attributed to Socrates. So, even centuries ago, parents felt that their children did not follow their guidance. My generation listened to the stories of how our parents walked to school in 3 feet of snow. I was told how lucky I was that disposable diapers were invented, as the women of the 1950's had to wash cloth ones. My children cannot believe that there was a time when juice packs did not exist. I remember many years ago, wondering how liquid could be put into a cardboard box and not leak. When my children were toddlers, we carried thermoses. The world seems to be changing too rapidly for me. If I have gotten to the phase in life when I can say "I remember when....", then time has really flown by. Even language has been effected. The meaning of many words have changed. If you are my age, you will remember the old ones as well as the new. Remember when:
Spam was a lunch meat
A mouse was a rodent
Pasta was called macaroni
Jeans were referred to as dungarees
Cells were rooms that inmates lived in
Online really meant waiting on a line
Text was what you read on the pages of a book
Going viral was when chicken pox infected the school
I guess life is change.....and change is good.

It's A Dogs Life

God created all creatures, large and small. From the tiniest amoeba to the largest giraffe. In between, he created Man. While he created us with the ability to think, and reason, are we really on the top of his hierarchy? The other day I was looking at my dog and realized that maybe domesticated house pets are on the top of the list. Think about it. Every day I go to work and spend eight hours a day toiling at a somewhat pleasant job, to be able to have a decent quality of life. A roof over my head, clothes on my back and food in my stomach. Not to mention any occasional luxuries. Then I look at Shelby, the namesake of this blog. This is his daily routine: he sleep in his soft microfiber bed, until he hears breakfast being served. Then he gets up, stretches and saunters over to his food bowl. After eating, he walks downstairs to the back door and looks at me with his big brown eyes, waiting to be walked. I put on his color coordinated leash, and when it is raining out, his matching raincoat, with the slightly turned up and very fashionable fleece turtle neck. He scampers around the yard, relieves himself, and chases a few birds. He then sniffs the lawn, and we go in the house. I leave for work and he goes to look out the front window and be the neighborhood watch. When he gets a bit tired, he fluffs up a couch pillow and lays his head down for a nap. All this while I am at the office. When I get home, he eats again and then brings me a toy for a small game of catch. When I finally sit down, he crawls onto my lap to watch television and be petted, kissed and hugged. His total existence depends on me. He has never worked a day in his life, but he reaps all of the benefits. In my next life, I want to be Shelby!

The Savage Beast

This morning I woke up and did my usual workday routine. Shower, get dressed, feed and walk the dog and get in the car for the 20 minute ride to work. It was a gloomy looking day, grey and foggy. No matter how upbeat you are, these days make it an effort to do just about anything, much less go to work. I turned on my car radio to the usual oldies station. WHLI 1100am. I love this station. It is all oldies, but the good ones, like Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin. Way before my time, but classics. As I was half way into my ride, on came one of my favorite songs, "Sway with Me". I immediately smiled and actually applauded while driving. I sang along to it and even did the imaginary drummer moves on my steering wheel. After that song ended it segued into "Papa Loves Mambo" another favorite of mine. The Bravo TV show NJ Housewives resurrected this song. I was actually beaming with joy. I sang and swayed and tapped my feet to the music. My outlook on the day improved right away and when I arrived at work my attitude was set for the day. I guess the old saying that music soothes the savage beast is true.

Democracy?

Democracy is defined as a form of government in which all citizens have an equal say in the decisions that affect their lives. Ideally this includes equal participation in the proposal, development and passage of legislation into law. Sounds good, right? Too bad that this is not the reality of our democracy. Do we really have equal say? I never understood the electoral vote. If the popular vote is the majority, how can the opposing party win the electoral vote for the state. It makes no sense. One person, one vote. Not, one person, and let's skew the vote. Every two to four years, depending on which office is up for re-election, I have the possibility of casting my vote and making it count. That is about the last time anyone asks my opinion. From there on in, it is a free for all. Our representatives on Capitol Hill get together and decide, in my opinion, on random laws. I want to know who asked my opinion on whether or not we should give money to other countries. What about us? Who decided to give America's money away, when we ourselves are in debt. We find out that a law has already passed, before we even know what the law is regarding. We are all out of the loop. I feel like the "popular" kids all got together and made plans without me. I find out on Monday, what they did on Saturday. I think we need an "In The Loop" Law. I would be the first one to show up at the polls. 

Tick Tock....

All of us live on schedules, even if we do not think we do. We have a time to get up, a time to get ready for work, a time for break, a time for lunch and so on. Even the people that hate to have a clock rules their lives, more likely than not, still are a slave to time. That's just the way life is. The only people that seem to have a total disregard for time, are doctors.Where else can you sit for an hour waiting for someone, and then pay them for the privilege of seeing them. Years ago I waited so long for a doctors appointment, that my blood pressure skyrocketed. When the doctor asked me if I was under a lot of stress, because the reading was so high, I told him that it was normal when I got to the office and if it was high now, he caused it. Boy, was he sorry he asked that question. When he told me to come for a follow up visit, for my test results, I told him to call me with them, after 4pm, because I would never again sit for an hour and a half to see him. I sure felt empowered that day. The funny thing is, he did as I requested. I guess he thought he was dealing with a crazy lady. Senior citizens can't wait to retire so they will not have to abide by a schedule. Too bad someone invented the "early bird" special. Now they have to eat by 4pm or pay more, which isn't happening! Today I broke the rule.... I wanted to see if I could spend the day doing nothing and not looking at the clock. It was not fun and not easy to do. I guess I am so conditioned to follow a schedule that I just couldn't be free. Tomorrow I will be a clock watcher...and be proud of it.

Is Being Smart.... Dumb?

I am a smart person. I am not bragging, it is just a fact. I have a high IQ and skipped the eight grade. Most important of all, I have common sense. I was born like this, I had nothing to do with it. I have always said that someone with common sense is better off many times than someone that only has "book smarts". As I get older I am beginning to think that being smart is not the way to go. When you are smart, people expect more from you. They think that you can solve their problems. You become the "go to" person whenever there is a crisis. On the other hand, the dumb person is not expected to do much. Don't ask them, they can't do it. (Or so we think). If a dumb person does a task wrong once, they will never be asked again. And so their life goes on without anyone's expectations. If you work with a dumb person, you will probably have acquired some of their work duties. The worst combination is dumb and nice. They will coast along in life happily. Don't ask them for help because they are too dumb, but don't criticize because they are too nice. I am tired of being smart. I am getting burnt out. I think I need to try dumb for a while. Maybe the dumb people are really the smartest of them all.

Robbery vs Burglary

This afternoon, a friend and I were discussing crimes and their punishments. I am the type of person that gives others the benefit of the doubt, but not when it comes to blatant crimes. The ones that are so bold that I cannot believe that the criminal has the nerve to plead not guilty. We began to discuss a persons motives for robbery versus burglary. Which was worse? Robbery is stealing from a person. Burglary is stealing from a structure, like a house or business. I think that robbery is far worse. It is a face to face offense. It is for immediate money or something that will have a cash value. I joked that it is like the television commercial for J.G. Wentworth. 877-CASH-NOW. Face to face crimes have the potential of having a bad turn out. I think that we, as a nation need to have stricter punishments. It may not be a popular idea, but I do believe in capital punishment for heinous crimes. I believe in an eye for an eye. Until murderers can bring back their victims, they should be fine with losing their lives, too. What's fair is fair.

Define Wealth

I am a middle class person. My family works hard for every penny we make. I have no debt, but neither do I have extra money. Yet, I consider myself a wealthy woman. That is because I define wealth in a global sense. As I observe the world each day, I see many people with a lot of expensive things. Huge houses, fancy cars, blingy jewelry. Don't get me wrong. I like to have nice things, but there is a limit to what I will pay for them, even if I did have the money. Do people buy things just for the status. Sometimes I wonder, if a Mercedes logo was put onto a Hyundai, would people still buy it and claim it was the best car around. I have a Honda. It is safe and reliable and gets me where I have to go. As I help my son fix up the home he just bought, I see real wealth. The home needs a lot of work, which the entire family is helping him with, nail by nail. He doesn't have a mansion, but to him, his house is worth a million. He bought a house. He is turning it into a home. I define my wealth by the health and happiness of my family. When all said and done, the only thing that lives on as a testament to us all, is our reputation and no one can buy that. It is self created.

Drive Me Crazy

I consider myself to be a good driver. In all the years that I have been driving I have never received a traffic ticket. The only time my car was hit by another car, was when I was not even in it. I was parked at a shopping center and came back to find the damage. I attribute these statistics mainly to cautious, common sense driving and partially to luck. I have my routine when I drive. I am a middle lane driver and never go more than 9 miles above the speed limit. I have been told that the police will not pull you over if it is less than 10 miles above the limit. I abide by this theory and so far, so good. This morning, I drove a friend to the airport. He is what I would consider to be, a back seat driver. The trip started off by him telling me to make a left on red. Since it was 5:30 AM and no one was on the road, he considered this move to be legal. Of course I did not listen, but it seemed like an eternity until the light turned green so I could make the turn. Then he took off his seat belt. My car beeps if the front seat passenger disengages the seatbelt, so I didn't have to see what he did..... I heard it. After having the seat belt argument, it progressed to lane changing. I am not an impatient person. If a lane slows down for a minute, I go with the flow. I see no need to swerve in and out of lanes. What is the big deal if I get to my destination 4 minutes later? By the time I got him to the airport, my head was pounding and my hands were shaking. I told him that the next time I drive him anywhere, he might be riding in the trunk.

Everything Old

There is an old saying, "Everything old is new again". Life rejuvenates and perpetuates. The old standards find themselves being re worked into modern standards and most of the time people do not even realize it. My case in point, is the way we communicate with each other. The original method of long distance communication was Morse Code. Dot, Dot , Dash, interpreted by the person on the other end of his Morse Code machine, who knew the code. Then years down the line, the telex machine was invented. You sat in front of a large machine and typed your message in full. When you were done you hit a button that would transmit the message, to type into another telex machine. I remember using one of these contraptions as late as 1980. Of course the telephone was always the preferred method of communicating. Imagine, talking to a friend or loved, one hundreds of miles away and hearing their voice in real time. Before we knew it, along came cell phones. You can still hear the live voice, but now you can hear it from anywhere in the world. What freedom of speech! As soon as we all learned how to use our cells, texting became all the rage. The younger generation will have the strongest thumb muscles. I think we may even mutate into growing over sized thumbs if this keeps up. So now, if we really think about it, we are back 150 years ago. Typing to our friends and hitting the send button. I guess everything old is still new again.

UnReal

Years ago we had only 7 television channels and there was always something good to watch! Today some of us have up to 300 channels and complain that there is nothing good on TV. When I was young, we used to get the TV Guide delivered to our home. Every September, I anxiously awaited the Fall Issue. It was a double sized edition and it contained the listing of all the new television series. Each show had a small synopsis of cast, characters and what the show was about. Each station seemed to have the same plot but with different stars. There was always a new family type show, a new police show and a new teen type show. Today, America is all about "Reality". Every theme seems to have a reality show. Dancing, Singing, Traveling, Cops, etc. Even though these shows are promoted as "reality", how real are they. I think we are fooling ourselves into a false sense of reality. The worst offender is the "Real Housewives" series. For those of you have have watched this show, could you please tell me where they are hiding the housewives? Last time I looked, housewives did not wear gowns to go food shopping, nor did they have spa parties for a dozen friends. When I go food shopping I do not wear evening makeup and 6 inch heels. Sneakers and jeans, that's my outfit. The last time I had a girls night out, we went to have pizza, not to Mexico for a 5 day get away. I no longer watch these shows. I now live in reality by not watching reality.

Generations

I am a people watcher. I love to quietly observe human interactions. When my kids were young I used to take them to major league ball games. I never even looked at the playing field. I was too busy focusing on the people sitting around me. I was trying to figure out the dynamics of their relationships to each other. Were they family or friends or co workers. Was the young couple on a first date? What were they eating. And so on. Last night I was in a Chinese take out waiting for my order to be prepared. Working behind the counter was a boy about 11 years old. He must have been the owners son. A bright kid. Anyway.... in walked an elderly man of at least 75 years old. When the boy saw him, his face lit up. "I tried the puzzle you taught me and it worked" said the boy. The old man looked thrilled and said "I have another one for you". The man took a pencil and paper out of his pocket and walked behind the counter to stand next to the boy. He wrote out some sort of mathematical problem. In my mind I was thinking that this man must have been a Math teacher before he retired. The two of them discussed the math problem and the young boy asked many questions. After a few minutes the man's order was ready. He said to the boy, "work on the solution and I will see you next week". For some reason watching this exchange made me smile. Are we really ever too old to teach, or too young to learn?

Honor Thy Neighbor

I live in a highly populated area on the outskirts of New York. Each house plot is approximately 60' x 100 '. Not too bad of a size. This allows for many families to live on the same block. Yet. when I go on vacation through rural America, and see the vast acres of land that separates each family, I can't help but think if they feel lonely, being so far away from other people. What if there was an emergency. Not the kind that needed police, but the kind that needed a friend. Who would they call? My son moved into a new house this week and we are watching the neighbors walk past us while jogging or walking their dogs. Not one of them have looked up at us to make eye contact so we could say hello and introduce ourselves. Maybe they think we are the hired help fixing the house up, but never the less, we are still people. Then I got down to thinking....... I am living in the same home for 30 years and could not tell you the names of the people 4 doors down the block. We go into and out of cars and never take time to stop and say hello to each other. Kind of sad.Today when I am back at the house working, I will make it my business to be the one to break the ice and say hello and see what reaction I get. Maybe being close has nothing to do with distance, but with state of mind.

Bad Business

I have been getting my dog groomed in the same place for the four years I have him. The people are nice and the prices are good. The other day, I got a call from a new dog grooming store that just opened up in my neighborhood. A young man informed me that the old groomer was no longer in business and that his shop was the new place for grooming. I felt bad, as I liked the old groomer, but sometimes business go out. I was not ready to make an appointment yet, so I took the new stores telephone number and said I would call back. Now... here comes the funny part. Last night I get a call from the original groomer, offering me a $10 discount for the next haircut, as a holiday gift. Hmmmmm....... I thought they were out of business. I told the old groomer about the phone call I received and she was shocked and angry. That is bad business. Someone must have stolen her database and called her customers. She said she would look into this and thanked me for the information. I then called the new place and asked them why they would call me and lie. After a lot of double talk, saying the person that called must have been confused, I told them to take my name off any list they had. I also informed them that I told the other groomer what went on. Do people really think they can be dishonest and not get caught, eventually?

No Strings Attached

Many years ago, while standing on a soccer field, watching my son play ball, I saw a man talking to himself. All of the parents stared at him, thinking he was delusional. When I looked closer, he was holding a brick like object to his ear. It had an antenna coming out of it. Someone said it was device called a Cell Phone. We all stood there with our eyes wide open, utterly amazed at this invention. How could he be on the telephone, in the middle of a soccer field, with no wire attached? Of course that was a very long time ago and cell phones are now an extension of our hands. Are we really better off since their invention. Sometimes I think we are not. We lost a lot of our privacy and independence by having cell phones. And a lot of excuses too. We can no longer say "I tried calling you, but no one was home". We are at the beck and call of family and friends and there is no where to hide. We lost our "Me" time. Time to drive in your car and just think. Time to take a walk totally interrupted. Children do not have to learn to solve life's problems anymore, because all they have to do it "hit the cell" and ask mom and dad for advice.  We have become a rude society. Eating a meal with one person while talking to another. Not to mention texting. I want to return to the olden days when relationships meant more than technology.

Air Quality

Everyday most of us surround ourselves with many people. Some are friends, some are co workers and the rest are just random individuals we encounter in an anonymous way. I breakdown these people into three categories: The Air Fresheners, the Regular Airs and the Air Suckers. Lets start with the Air Fresheners. I love this category. The minute they walk into a room it is like a burst of fresh air has blown in. It has nothing to do with they way the smell, but with the aura they bring with them. I equate them to flowers and plants. They bring with them, more oxygen. They are easy to be with and make the encounter pleasurable. It is almost like a high. You breathe easy. The Regular Airs are just that. It is like breathing. You don't really think about it, it just happens. Now I come to the Air Suckers. The minute they walk into the room the air is sucked out. They drain every particle, until you feel like you are going to black out. It is almost like a hand covering your mouth. You can no longer breathe.The funny thing is that the Air Suckers have no idea they are doing this. They do not even realize that they are suffocating the life out of everyone they come in contact with. I hope when I walk into a room people think I am a breath of fresh air.

It's the small things

I am a happy person, by nature. I was born that way. I see the best in people. Sometimes I have to dig real deep to find it but I always do. I call myself a "spin doctor". I can take any situation and spin it around until I see the best in it. I am a full glass person not a half empty one. My point today is that I can be nice and kind and caring, and it doesn't cost me a penny. It is one of the few things you can still do for free, and feel good about it. The only down side of being this way, is that it is so disappointing when others only see the negative. Today I had a wonderful encounter with someone I barely know. She did something kind for my son. She didn't realize that her small gesture would mean so much to me and him. When I told her just how much we appreciated what she had done, she cried. It was just one small thing, but it meant the world........

A Child Was Born

A child was born this morning. He arrived into the world at 12:01AM. He was welcomed by a warm and loving family. He will be brought home to a safe and secure environment. From that moment on, nature will take it's course. No one seems to really know how much Nature vs Nurture plays a part in our development. Children from the same home can turn out very different. If all variables are the same, this should not happen, but it does. Are our core personality tendencies formed, for the most part, in vitro. In the 1970's there was a television documentary, filmed in England, called "Give me the Child". It was an anthropology study that traced 10 children from the age of 7 until the age of 35, each one being interviewed individually and in the group, every 5 years. The theory was "Give me the child at 7, and I will give you the man". It was amazing to see that the qualities the children showed at 7, were the same ones they showed at 35. The introverts remained introverted. The outspoken remained outspoken. One child that was a terrible troublemaker, had his last interview done while incarcerated. How much power do we really have over our destiny? A child was born this morning..........

Just Your Average Joe

My son just bought a new house, so the topic of schools came up. I had not thought about school systems in years, as my children are grown. He happened to purchase his home in the same neighborhood he grew up in but in the "better" school district. It got me to thinking...... we all place a lot of importance on grades and ranking but in reality, does a better school district lead to a better adult life? From what I see, it did not. I always wanted my kids to be "Average". Not the best, not the worst, but dead center average. Being the best brings along with it, a higher level of stress. I remember the children that wept when they got an A- on a test. Grow up! Life at it's best is about a B. Being the worst brings another kind of stress. Struggling to get a good paying job is not easy and without a good education you are in a deficit. Average is like the middle lane of the highway. You have the freedom to have movement. Some days you do things better and some you don't.

No More Multi Tasking

I hate multitasking! In fact, when I hire my office staff, I specifically tell the applicant that I do not expect them to be a  multi tasker. I expect a single task, attention to detail, person. Do one thing at a time and do it well. That is my philosophy. For some reason, the world has gotten it into it's mind that many things must go on at once. In the "olden days" (and this was without modern computer technology) things were done at a normal pace and done correctly. Start a project and follow through until it is done, sans errors! Yesterday I went to purchase a few varied items in a craft store. The worker there was mixing and matching so quickly that I was losing track. When I reviewed the order before I purchased it, things were missing. I called the salesgirl back and told her that we needed to go over the order in a systematic way. One item at a time, one color at a time. When we did it that way, it was done correctly. No mistakes. Why are we all in such a rush that we need to do 10 things at once and then have to re-do it the right way. Sometimes the fastest way to get things done, is to do it slowly.

Food For Thought

Yesterday, in work, we were deciding what food to order for lunch. We only have two choices, as the area I work in, is mostly medical buildings. We have Chinese and Italian. After 9 years, it gets boring. I then asked my co-workers what their favorite food was. One person said Greek food. One said lobster. When it came to my turn to answer, I realized that I had not eaten my most favorite food in 45 years and that I would never eat it again. My favorite food was Petcha. My Grandmother used to make it for the family. It is calves feet that are boiled and seasoned to perfection. The feel of eating it adds to the taste of eating it, as a jelly is formed as it cooks. There is no other food that tastes like this. After I said my food choice, another woman I work with said "Oh my gosh.... I haven't thought of Petcha in years". It seems that her grandmother also made it, and when our grandmothers passed away, many of their recipes died with them. Each recipe was made a bit different, so no two grandma's Petcha would taste the same. I looked online and there are recipes for this dish. They are complicated and take hours. Even if I made it, it wouldn't taste the same. The missing ingredient would be my Grandmother's love.

Look into my Eyes

Most people are very quick to judge others. They look at what the other person is doing and saying. The only problem is, that they never take a good look at themselves. Over the years I have worked with a variety of people. One of them had the nastiest tone in her voice. The funny thing was, that she was the first one to tell me if someone has spoken abruptly to her. She always used to say, "I hate nasty people". I never understood how she could not see that she was the nastiest of all. It bothers me when people make random unkind comments about people they do not even know. Why does it matter if someone is overweight? Maybe their heart is as big as their frame. Maybe the person that is not attractive on the outside is beautiful on the inside. I always loved the famous quote "It is only with our hearts that one can truly see. What is essential is invisible to the eye". I think that is why G-d made our bodies with our eyes pointing outward. If they pointed inward, we would all have to take a good look at ourselves, and some of us would not be very happy.

Northern Lights

The Northern Lights are a natural light display, in the sky, in polar regions. They are caused by the collision of charged particles directed by the Earth's magnetic field. I would like to talk about another set of Northern Lights. They are found in Nassau County, NY on the Northern State Parkway. It seems that some politicians thought it would be a good idea to waste even more of our tax payer dollars by installing senseless signs along the roadway. The purpose was to let drivers know how long it will take them to get from point A to point B. The signs were costly to make and when they are not broken, use a lot of electric. Who OK'd this project? I find it a distraction and after I tried to read it the first time, I realized that I was concentrating on figuring out which roadway I was looking for, and not on the road. Why does it matter how many minutes it will take to get to my destination. If it is 10 minutes or 15 minutes, I still have to drive on the same road. Is this sign inferring that I should text or call the place I am driving to, to let them know I will be 4 minutes late? I thought that was illegal. These signs do not take into consideration, the slow driver ahead of me. I decided not to look at the signs anymore, and if there is traffic I will just relax and sing along with the radio. I will get there when I get there.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Aretha Franklin said it best. RESPECT. We used to earn it or give it, but recently I do not think we can even find it. Not only do we not have respect for others, some of our youth does not have respect for themselves. I find it disgraceful to walk behind a young man who has his jeans so low down under his behind, that his boxer shorts are visible. How is he trying to portray himself to the world. Do strangers need to see his underwear? To me it shows laziness, and slovenliness. By his appearance, I can tell that he is most likely unemployed and uneducated. Part of our respect problem stems back to our school system and its' dress code. When I was in school we respected and even feared the teachers and the principal. Just the thought of being sent to the principals office kept most of us in line. Now students feel they do not have to follow rules and even curse at authority figures and get away with it. WE fear THEM! When did our standards become so low that we became complacent and allowed this. I may be wrong but I think that how you dress can change how you act. That is why parochial schools have higher test scores. When you wear proper attire you sit up a little straighter and perform better. It's a fact. Furthermore, the way we disrespect the police is appalling. In my world, when a police officers asks you to move your car if it is illegally parked....you move it. When they ask you a question ....you answer them. This should not be a choice. Democracy does not mean "free for all".

Use Your Inside Voices......

I do not know about anyone else, but I am annoyed by people who talk on their cell phones in public. For some reason everyone yells. I am surprised that there are not more casualties from people being hit by cars, as they walk and talk. It is as if they zone out and have no idea where they are walking. I have even seen somebody finish their call and stand there dumbfounded because they have no idea how they go to where they were standing. They were just aimlessly walking as they had their conversation. I do not want to hear about your marital issues, your children's bad behavior or which friend is gossiping about the other. Once, at an airport, a woman was talking so loud that another passenger actually told her to hang up. We all applauded as the woman ran into the restroom totally embarrassed. Let's remember what we all learned in kindergarten....even if you are outside you need to use your "Inside Voice".

Too Much Conversation......

Ninety percent of our daily conversation is nonsense. Only ten percent has some value. If we clocked our daily word usage we would probably use a few hundred thousand a day. For some people those words are hateful ones, for some they argumentative ones and for others just plain irritating ones .A smaller percentage of us use the kind and caring ones. America's speech patterns have become worse with age. So many people use the "F" word five times in one sentence. To me this is a filler word. It has no meaning but some people think it makes their sentences stronger. I feel the opposite. I have always told my children that if they have to use profanity to make their point...they have no point. The best way to have someone listen to what you are saying is to say it in a low soft tone. Caribbean people speak with a lilt in their voices, almost like a song.  Their speech is comforting. Even though most Americans go to school through the twelfth grade their grammar is appalling. I hate the word "youse" as much as I hate the word"aks" and will someone please tell me what "Not for nothing" means. I really think it means nothing! Did everyone sleep though their English classes?