Support System

This morning my sister is on her way to Florida. My father has not been feeling well for a few days. He went to a walk in  urgent care facility and they diagnosed a virus. He did not want to go to the ER. He was afraid that my mother would be alone and fearful of not having anyone else there with him to make decisions. Yesterday he said that he was too weak to walk. After all day phone calls back and forth, I made the executive decision that my sister would fly down to assess the situation. It was not an easy decision to make but as soon as it was done, we relaxed. He has to go to dialysis today and if he was too weak to drive, how could he get there. Now, she will take him. I am hopeful that by this morning he will feel better and my sister can have an enjoyable visit.

Best Gift Ever

This is the time of year when people buy gifts for everyone. Some gifts have a lot of thought behind them and others are just bought because we have to. Think for a minute about the best gift you ever received. I am looking at mine now. Last year my son and daughter in law sent me a framed picture of my granddaughter. When I opened it, it took me a second to focus in on it. It was an 8x10 of her face. Just her face. Life size. She is posed with her hands resting on her chin. She isn't smiling, she is just looking at me with a peaceful glow. I put her on the desk where my computer is. When I Skype with her I always show her the picture and she assumes the same pose and laughs. When I feel sad, I sit at the desk and talk to her. When I am happy I do the same. Out of all the gifts I ever got, this one tops the list. It didn't cost them much to make it, but it is priceless to me.

Overload

I feel like I am on overload. There is so much going on lately that my head is spinning. There is a saying that someone has a "full plate". I feel like I have a smorgasbord with more being cooked in the kitchen. Some things are public knowledge and others cannot be told to everyone yet. In the end, everything will settle down, but for the time being my head is not attached to my shoulders. Yesterday, I got dressed and when I was walking out of my house I looked down to see that I was still wearing my pajama bottoms. I had on all of the rest of my clothes, but I forgot to put on my pants before I put on my shoes.

Perfection

Some days just flow. Yesterday was one of them. I went to New Jersey for the holiday. I was anticipating heavy traffic but it flowed. I arrived at my niece's home and played with her new baby. We looked into each others eyes and bonded. The cocktail hour was so delicious that I filled my stomach up to capacity. The dinner was even more delicious but I did not eat a lot. Desserts are always over the top! The ride home was even better than the ride there. A perfect day.

Thankful

Happy Thanksgiving. This year I have a lot to be thankful for. My parents are doing well. I am expecting a new grandchild. Certain prayers have been answered. I am not only thankful, I am grateful. This is my favorite holiday. I spend it with extended family that I only see once a year. The food is wonderful. The day has a cozy feeling, like being wrapped in a warm blanket wearing fuzzy slippers. The ride to my niece's house may take two hours, but I can spend the time looking forward to the wonderful day that I will be having.

Season's Start

Today is the unofficial start of the holiday season. People will begin traveling home for Thanksgiving. This will be followed by Black Friday, Cyber Monday and a month of mandated shopping. Stress levels rise because people do not know what to buy and most do not have the budget for it. This is the time of year when my office sees an increase in patients. As much as it is a happy season, it is also a depressing one. When the holiday season ends, most people give a sigh of relief.

Two Minutes

We all have possessions. Most of us have more than we will ever need. We probably do not know what is hiding in our closets or basements. I read about an exercise yesterday that I found interesting. If your house was burning down and the firemen gave you two minutes to collect your most valued belongings, what would you take? There would be no time to think. Grab and go. What would be the most important items that would hurt to lose. For me it would be pictures of my children and my pocketbook. That's all that I would need. What would you choose?

Replay

My mind is like a tape recorder, even though those are obsolete. I "record" through my eyes and information is burned into my memory. The only downside to this is that I do not chose when to replay the information. My mind chooses. Unfortunately, its choice of times is not the best. Somehow my mind feels that it should replay its memories in the middle of the night. This leads me to believe that my mind is a "night worker".

The Unknown

I teach a seminar about "Fears,Worries and Concerns". There is one concept that comes up in everyone's life at some point. The fear of the unknown. Sometimes it has to do with employment or family or health. We do not have all of the facts so we speculate. Speculation causes anxiety because it is not concrete. I teach that the fear of the unknown is far worse than the reality of the event. The reality is concrete so we can deal with it. We can formulate a plan. We can move forward.

Time Out

When my children were young I never did time out as a punishment. I either yelled at them or hit their behinds. My children believe in time outs. Last night I was at my son's house. My grandson started to throw toys over the gate to the den. My son told him to stop it. He did not. Instead he took another toy and threw it. Within one second, my son scooped Him up and put him into his crib for a time out punishment. He left him there for  three minutes. After that he walked into the bedroom and asked him if he knew what he did wrong. He said the he threw a basket over the gate. He then said he was sorry. My son asked him for a kiss. They kissed and he was lifted out of the crib. No other toys were thrown that night.

Enhanced

Today I am going to get an enhanced driver's license. I heard that after January 19, 2015, people that live in New York will no longer be able to fly anywhere unless they have a passport or enhanced license. Four states have this new regulation because it seems that New York does not make you validate your citizenship or place of residence with documentation. I am glad that I found this out now as I usually travel in January. I have gotten together all of my papers that prove that I am who I say I am. The only upside of this is that now the DMV allows you to make a reservation for a time slot. At the end of the day I will be enhanced.

Disruptive

Some people are disruptive within a group. They take over and alienate what would have otherwise been a cohesive group of people. Once a month, my office hosts a free walk in support group. Anyone can attend. Just walk right in. After years of having this group, friendships have formed. After the group, the people continue the night at a local diner. About six months ago a new person joined the group. She argues with the other members and interrupts the doctor running the group. Last month, the group pulled aside the doctor and said that they no longer want this woman to attend. The doctors have been afraid to mention this to my boss. Yesterday, I pulled my boss aside and explained the situation. Other doctors then joined into the conversation. I was the one elected to  call the woman and "disinvite" her from the group meetings. She did not take it well. She demanded to speak to the doctors. I said no. She demanded to  speak to the director. I said no. I told her that we were not in negotiations. The decision was final. She said that she might show up anyway. I said that if she did, she would be asked to leave. She said she might not. I said that if she doesn't, we will. When I go into work this morning I will see what happened.

Trophy Wife

There is an expression, "trophy wife". It usually refers to a woman (usually a second wife) whose husband pampers her. All she needs to do is look young and beautiful. She is a trophy that he has won after he has made it in the business world. Trophy wives are perfectly coiffed and wear stylish clothes. They do not have to be intelligent. They only need to look good enough to have other men be jealous. This kind of trophy wife is for the rich. Most people never focus on the other type of trophy wife. She is the one that deserves a trophy for putting up with her husband and not beating him to death. She cooks, cleans, takes care of the kids and carpools endless hours. She usually does not complain as it would fall on deaf ears. She is a smart woman who knows how to run things. She is the real trophy.

DIY Gift

The best gifts are DIY. Buy a gift card and you can't go wrong. Don't buy me things that I will never use. If you have never seen me wear a scarf, don't buy me one. If I liked scarves, I would wear them. Don't buy me scented soaps or scented candles. Not everyone likes the same fragrance. I am sensitive to smells, so if I get them I hide them far away so I can't smell them. I was at a party Sunday and yesterday the birthday girl came to work layered in her gifts. She wanted to show the people that she liked them. She will probably never wear them again as nothing was her taste. I gave a gift card. A DIY gift. Buy what you like. Take the pressure off me. That's the holiday spirit.

The Eyes

Yesterday I went to a 60th birthday party of a co worker. There were over 50 people there, most being family. My co worker's husband comes from a family of 14. Each family has at least two children and each child has at least two children of their own. If you do the math, the immediate family is well over a hundred people. She decided to only have her office friends and her brothers and sisters in laws, to keep the party small. As I was introduced to each family member, I noticed their eyes. They all had the same light blue eyes. After a few introductions, I could pick out the family members by just looking at them. At one point, I scanned the room and all I saw was a bunch of blue eyes shining at me. It felt like cats on a fence. It was a bit eerie. Pop, pop, pop, blue, blue, blue. I decided to focus on my shrimp as they were less distracting.

Up or Down?

I have the answer to a burning question. Which is the correct way to hang a roll of toilet paper. In my house we hang it with the paper pulling from over the roll, down. I came from a home that pulled it from under the roll, up. In work, depending on who replaces the roll (and it is a given that it will only be a woman, as men have not honed that skill), it can go either way. The correct way is to hang the paper roll from the top down or the overhead method. Although toilet paper has been around since the 14th century, in 1883 an inventor patented the toilet paper roll device.The patent show the roll hanging in the overhead method. So now that the question is answered, how many people will adjust their method?

Guard Down

We have left our guard down, as a country and as a world. We can no longer call World War II the war to end all wars. In letting our guard down we have lost our strength. The mindset of this administration is to be kind to the world. Our president has been quoted as saying that the people that are beheading innocent victims are poor and unemployed. If they had jobs they would have better things to do. This is a fact. He actually said it. There can be no kindness. We cannot try to understand. The only option is to protect ourselves in whatever way is deemed necessary. Last night was a tragedy for the French people. My heart goes out to them. The dead and injured were out for a night of entertainment. They were blindsighted by radical suicide bombers. They were sitting ducks. The last time this happened, at Charlie Hebdo, the world joined forces and marched arm in arm to show solidarity. The only missing country was the United States. We never showed up. We did not want to insult the terrorists. Again, this is a fact. You would think that after the World Trade Center attacks, we would have learned that danger is always lurking. This time when I vote for President, I want someone who can be feared by the world. Someone who knows how to run things. Not a cowering fool who works against the nation.

A Key Rule

There are certain rules in life that evolve from common sense. The key in a coat rule is one of them. If you have to hang up your coat in a public closet, you have to remove your personal items such as keys or wallets, before you leave the room. My husband never knew that rule. Last week he went to his volunteer job and hung his coat in the executive suite closet. It should have been a safe area. When he returned to get it a few hours later, his coat was gone. If that was not bad enough, his car keys were in it. He was frantic. How would he get home? He asked the secretary if she saw anyone take his coat. She said there was a conference, so maybe someone from there took it. She made a few calls and located the coat in College Point, Queens. A well intentioned woman saw a lone coat so she brought it back to her office. She then had to get back into her car and drive the coat and keys back to the hospital. Next time he will keep his personal belongings on him.

Conservation

Last night I saw a new commercial. It showed a man standing in front of a sink brushing his teeth. As he brushed, the water was running. There was a disclaimer on the screen saying that when you keep the water running as you brush your teeth, you waste four gallons of water. The commercial was from Colgate toothpaste. It made so much sense. This morning when I was brushing my teeth, I left the water running, as usual. Then the commercial popped into my head. I immediately shut off the water as I continued brushing. When I needed to rinse my mouth and the brush, I opened the water again. I probably did save three to four gallons of water. From now on that will be my new method.

Save The Date

I am very diligent about my yearly doctor visits. Last February, I visited one of my doctors during the worst ice storm. I never thought I would make the drive home safely. After the visit I booked my appointment for February 2016. Since it was so far in advance and I did not have a 2016 calendar, I took the appointment card and taped it onto the December 2015 page of my calendar. When it becomes 2016 I will mark it on the new calendar. Yesterday I received a call from that doctor's office telling me that they were already booking for May and since I was there in February, I should make an appointment as soon as I could. I told the girl that I already booked one. She said that my name does not appear on their computer schedule. I went to the December calendar and got the card. I told her that I have a card from her office staff saying February 1, 2016 at 2:40pm. She said that was last year's appointment card. I said that to my knowledge, we were still in 2015 and that February 2016 was months away. I then told her that she needed to call whomever was in that time slot and cancel them as it was my appointment. She paused a minute and said that I could come in at 2:25pm that day. I said okay. She asked me if I could fax her a copy of the appointment card so she could see who wrote it out but never actually booked it. I said I would do that today. Then I added that it was a good thing that I kept the card, otherwise she would have told me that I was 100% in the wrong and her office never booked that time. She was silent. I guess you really need to keep the "save the date" cards.

Packaging

We live in a modern world. Things are technologically advanced. We can talk on a wireless phone through a signal that beams from outer space. How come no one ever thought about updating the packaging of a bar of cream cheese? It is the worst packaging of any food. First there is a cardboard box that lifts open. Once you lift the flap, it never closes tightly again. If you open it from the side, it still remains unsealed. Once you get to the cheese, you need to fight with the foil wrapping. Lift two ends. Pull back from the seam. Now that you have accomplished that, do you cut the bar of cheese from the length or the width. Either way is sloppy. Once you have used the proper amount, you need to reseal the foil. Do you recinch it? Do you roll it? It never looks neat and it is never air tight. Now you have sloppy foil wrapped cheese being put into a floppy cardboard box. There has to be a better way.

The Cobbler

The other day my son asked me if I knew a good cobbler. I had to think for a minute. Did he mean a dessert? No, he meant a shoemaker. An old man that had a store that smelled of rubber cement. The kind of store that was in every neighborhood when I was younger. The shops always looked the same. They were dark and small and had tons of old shoes sitting on the floor and in the back. There was the wooden shoe that was attached upside down to his worktable. You brought in old broken shoes and they came out shiny and new. It was a spa for shoes. They were rejuvenated. When I moved into this neighborhood thirty years ago, there were three shoemakers. Now there are none. My son needed a new rivet on a leather case and only an old time shoemaker has the rivet machine. I will do a search for the closest cobbler. Somehow I think that there will be no items to match my search.

Business Dinner

Last night we went to dinner with our family. My sister in law and brother in law wanted to celebrate my son's new career move and they planned a great dinner at a wonderful restaurant. They brought a gift for the baby and he will enjoy playing with it for years to come. As usual it was a fun night. Great company, great food and great advice. The advice part was for me. My sister in law has an eye for art and a mind for sales. There are certain people who are always on target and she is one of them. I showed her some of my mosaic designs. Mosaics have become my new hobby. She gave me tips on what items would sell and how to price them. The item that she thought would be the best seller was so nice that my daughter in law took it home for herself. This morning I will be at Michael's rebuying the wooden plaque so I can recreate it and put it up for sale.

Bedding

I have a morning routine. I get up and out of bed. The next thing I do is make my bed. I straighten out the sheets, neatly pull the covers straight and place my throw pillows on it. This takes about one minute. I actually timed it one day and I did it in 56 seconds. We were discussing our housekeeping tips in work a few weeks ago and my bookkeeper said that she never makes her bed. She leaves the covers balled up however they were when she got up. I asked why she would do that. She responded that it was healthier to leave a bed unmade. She believes that whatever bugs that lurk in your mattress will leave in the morning. If you make the bed they are trapped. I looked at her, dumbfounded. I asked her where she learned of this. She could not remember. It was the most ridiculous statement that I ever heard. This was from someone that smokes cigarettes and has the fake glue nails adhered to her fingers for 20 years without removing them from her nails to breathe.

In The Shadows

Last night I was driving to my son's house. It was 5:15pm and already dark out. As I turned onto his block, I vaguely saw a shadow. A young woman in her thirties was walking in the street at a vigorous pace, wearing headphones. I almost did not see her. If I did not see her, would anyone else? I slowly rode up along side of her and she still was unaware that I was there. I pulled down my window and honked my horn. For a second she was startled. I told her that she was not visible on the roadway and could be hit by a car. She was wearing all black. She thought for a second and then thanked me for the warning. She said she did not think about her dark clothing when she went out to walk. She thanked me a few more times and went onto the sidewalk to continue her walk.

The Clicker

Usually noises do not annoy me. Lately for some reason one type of noise irritates me. That noise is the clicking of the computer's mouse. Two people that I spend most of my time with are incessant clickers. My receptionist at work and my husband have clicking issues. When I am in a room with either of them and they are using the computer, all I hear is click, click, click, bang, click. The bang comes in between the clicks, when the computer does not move fast enough. They both do not realize that if you click on something ten times, all it does is confuse the computer. Ten clicks on one option does not mean the computer will move ten times faster. Neither of them knows how to use the scroll button. Instead of smoothly scrolling down the page, they would rather make unnecessary noise. I have commented on their annoying clicking and banging but they both give me a blank stare. It is a good thing that both of their mouses are attached by a wire. If they were WiFi mouses, I would have thrown them out of the window.

Pillow Talk

I did something this morning and I feel guilty. I ripped the tag off of my pillow. The tag says, "Under penalty of law this tag not to be removed except by the consumer". I want to know what law. Where in the penal code is the law that deals with pillows? If there is a law, why? What makes a pillow more important than a sheet? Or a toothbrush? Who decided that the pillow is sacred? I want to research this question to know the rationale. I think that the law also applies to mattresses. Maybe it is called the "bedding law". I am holding on to the tag just in case the pillow police come knocking on my door. I can always sew it back on.

The Poser

Today in work, I will be the poser. We have been working on a new website for a year and although we keep taking pictures to post, they are never good. People's eyes are going different ways. Their hands are flying. People with hair look bald. My assignment today is to take each person into their office and pose them to look like a professional head shot. Then I will need to set up a group shot that looks like they are in a meeting setting. Hopefully I will look so busy that no one will notice that I did not have a picture taken of myself.

Worriers

As the years pass, my parents worry less about things but I worry more. They have become like college students with the "whatever" mentality. I worried all day yesterday as they were traveling to Florida. I worried when they were at the airport and not at the gate until 5 minutes before the flight boarded. They said that they were going to be at the gate on time. They were. I worried until I saw the flight land. I waited for a phone call from them saying they were safe. I waited and waited and waited. No call. Finally after 6 hours, I called. They were in their apartment, unpacking. I asked why they did not call? They said they never realized they needed to.

Migration

It is the time of year for a special type of bird to migrate down south. The elusive snowbirds are gearing up and they will arrive a few at a time in their native land of Florida. Some will fly and some will drive. Others will go by train. Today, my two snowbirds are flying away. It has been a stressful week as packing up is never easy. Add that to a bad cold and things are even harder. Their car left on Saturday and will make the trip with other cars like itself. They will be reunited with their owners in a few days.Today I will be a clock watcher. I will chart the time of departure, time of arrival and time of safe drop off at their home.