All Together Now

One of my cousins died a few days ago. He was a first cousin but I had not seen him since I was a child. He lived in Massachusetts since he was in college. He passed away at 68 years old from a sudden heart attack. He was my mother's nephew. Even though I did not personally know him, I knew about him. As a teenager, he loved to read the dictionary. He went to Bronx High School of Science. He was the CEO of a major computer company. This company discovered "analog" years before Bill Gates created Microsoft. The last time I checked, my cousin was on the Forbes 500 list and his ranking was double digits. Needless to say, he was a wealthy man. He left behind a wife and two children. What he also left behind was a reputation of being a wonderful family man, and an employer that had a loyal staff for years. He treated people the way he would like to be treated. The most important thing that I will remember about him was the way he treated my mother. Every few months they would talk on the phone. On the occasions that she would call him, she was treated like royalty. When she got to his executive secretary, all she had to say was that Aunt B was calling. The secretary had instructions to find my cousin wherever he was, because this was a call he would always take. There were times when he would leave a meeting to talk to my mother. When she told him that she felt bad that he was pulled out of a meeting, he would say "they can wait for me, you are more important". I am sorry that he is gone and my heart goes out to his family.

Returning Home

My sister has been on vacation for a week. She takes a yearly cruise out of a different port each year. This year it was New Orleans. She likes a cruise for a few reasons. The first is that there is unlimited food. I have no idea how someone who is so thin fits so many meals into her stomach. The next reason is that a cruise is one of the only vacations that you can turn your cell phone off for a week. There is no regular cell service on the ship, only if you have an international phone. For one week, you are not involved in minutia. No calls from work. No calls from family. No calls from friends. One week to just relax and recharge your battery. So much has happened this week. I missed her so much.

No Standards

I ate a late lunch yesterday, after coming home from Manhattan. Since I had a big meal at 3pm there was no way I could eat dinner. I decided to watch television and relax at 5pm. Usually, I do not turn on the television until at least 8 o'clock, but since I did everything that needed to be done, I changed my routine. I do not know what shows are on at 5pm, so I scrolled through the TV guide and saw "Family Guy". I think I had watched it once before and people seem to think it is funny.  I tuned in and was kind of shocked. Partially at the content of the show and partially at the time it is on. Five o'clock is a time when children watch television after doing their homework. They could be scrolling the channels just like I did, looking for Sponge Bob and come across Family Guy. In one scene alone, the words "bitch, rape and child molester" were used. I am not joking. Besides the words, the innuendo was shocking. Did the executives at TBS ever watch the show? If they did and they feel that 5pm is an appropriate time to show it, they need to be fired. The next thing I write this morning will be a letter to TBS. What are the odds that they will respond?

Little Green Ball

I have my morning routine. Shelby also has his. We coexist very well and it seems to work. There is little deviation. Yesterday the routine started off as usual. I fed him, walked him and began to get myself ready for work. I put my lunch out on the table as usual waiting to pack it and then went to the computer to write this blog. Since it is Passover, I packed a different type of lunch. I took a box of matzoh, a small tub of hummus and a small avocado. Usually when I write my blog, Shelby relaxes on the couch or stands at the window and barks at the other dogs who are being walked. Yesterday he decided to throw a ball around and amuse himself. I saw him tossing it and retrieving it. He loves to play. Then, I came to a realization. His ball is orange but the one he was tossing around was green. I ran over to him, and in his mouth was the small avocado I had set aside for lunch. He had such a guilty look on his face. I took it out of his mouth and saw that it was still perfect with no teeth marks in it. I washed it off and took it to work.

Signs of Spring

I went to my son's house the other day and as I walked up his front stoop I looked at his lawn and there it was. I saw a crocus. A beautiful deep purple flower bud emerging from the pale green lawn. The crocus is the first sign of Spring. It arrives even before the daffodils bloom. Not every lawn has them, so I do not know when the previous owners planted them or if it just appears from cross pollination. For some reason just seeing this thin purple stalk brought a smile to my face. I rang my son's bell and as I walked into the front foyer and saw him and my daughter in law,  I said, "Spring is here, the crocus has bloomed". They both looked at me as if I was speaking another language. "What is a crocus?", they asked. I explained what the flower meant and brought them outside to see it. They looked at the flower, then looked at each other and then turned to me. "We see that thing every year and thought it was just a weed, so we keep pulling it out". So much for Mother Nature.

Happy Passover

Today is the first day of Passover. The holiday started last night at the first Sedar. I spent it with family and had the best time. The food was wonderful, as usual. The night flew by, as time always does, when you are having fun. As each year passes, the family dynamic changes. The "kids" are now adults. As I looked at them sitting around the table, I realized how lucky we, their parents, are. My son will be a father in a few months and has matured into a well rounded man. My daughter in law, who was a shy girl when I met her, is now a confident woman awaiting the birth of her son. My nieces are two beautiful, smart women who I would choose as friends, if I was not lucky enough to have them as family. I guess that is what holidays are really about. Being thankful for the people you love.

The Wings of Man

A new wing restaurant opened up in my neighborhood called Buffalo Wild Wings and we decided to eat there last night. The building used to have a nightclub in it so it was a very big place. When we parked the car, we saw groups of people "migrating" towards the door as if they were zombies. We entered the restaurant and saw that there were hundreds of tables and just as many television sets on the walls. The hostess said there would be a 40 minute wait, but I calculated the number of tables by the number of people waiting and thought that it would be more like 10 minutes. I was right. The menu offered "wings" and "boneless wings". How could boneless wings be wings. Birds cannot fly without bones in their wings. In reality, boneless wings are just like chicken nuggets. They had all types of flavors and spicyness. The place was so noisy that you could not even hear each other speak. It didn't matter because our mouths were busy eating. The food was very good and the atmosphere was fun. It will now go on our "rotation" of places to eat.

Aftermath

I am glad that yesterday is over. "The next day" is sometimes more stressful than "that day". I had to tell my children that there had been an accident and their father's "beloved" car was totaled. We went to the collision yard and saw what the car looked like in the daylight. Wheels were bent, the dashboard was pulled out and the hood was bent in a V shape. We stood there and looked in silence. There was nothing else we could do. After a few minutes, I turned my back and walked away. There was no reason to be there any longer. Tomorrow the saga will continue when the insurance company gets involved. They are based out of California, and the office was closed for the weekend, so all I could do was leave a message. Even though I was not in the car, I still feel like I was shaken up.

What Really Matters

There are people that value things. There are people that value people. Ever since I know him, my husband has valued cars. He pampers them like they are children. He watches over them like a hawk. If it rains, his car is tucked into the garage, safe and sound. To me, a car is just a way to get around town. If it gets me from point A to point B, I  am happy. For the past few years my husband has been obsessed with owning a collectible 1986 Mercedes. He got his wish last year. He has systematically restored the car to its original specifications, even down to the engine sticker. I have only sat in it once. Last night, he decided to take it for a ride as the weather was clear. He expected to have a nice drive and bring his "baby" back safe and sound. Nature thought otherwise. A mile away from home, on the parkway, a small animal jumped out in front of him. He turned to avoid it and hit the median. He then lost control and crossed over three lanes to the right and landed in a gully. That is when the car went on fire. The police and fire engines came to the scene and made him step back. Walk away from his precious car. Since they did not know where the origin of the flames and it was a dangerous situation, they took their axes and crow bars to the car and opened it up like in surgery. It took 2 hours for the car to then be lifted out of the gully and taken to a salvage yard, awaiting the insurance company. Except for being sore and covered in soot, my husband is fine. The moral of the story, is that the only thing that is really valuable in life ... is your life.

Real Early Bird

I am up at 5am waiting to pick up my sister and brother in law and take them to the airport. I think that the birds are still sleeping. I am usually off on Fridays but I changed my day off to accommodate my lecturing schedule. After the drive to the airport, I will go to work and wait until the building opens at 7am. I will then put in a full day's work and hope I do not fall asleep on my desk. This getting up early business is for the birds.

Double Duty

Today will be a full day. I am lecturing at two libraries, on opposite sides of New York, hours apart. The first one is on the Lower East Side at 10:30am and the next one is at Columbia University at 5:30pm. Since each lecture is only one hour, I will have a lot of down time. I decided to make the most of it and do something I have not done in a long time. I will visit the Museum of Natural History. There is no better place to spend a few hours. The last time I was there, my children were small and I focused more on their enjoyment than on mine. This time I will wander around looking at only the things that interest me. I am looking so forward to it!

Automatic

I switched fuel companies this year. I had been with my previous one for about 10 years but they were no longer the lowest priced company. Every company has special pricing for their new customers and they bump up the price the next year. I changed companies for that lower pricing. I have always been on automatic delivery and have about 4 deliveries a year. This new company seems to think that automatic delivery should be monthly. That is where our opinions differ. If they calculate correctly by "degree days" they should know when my tank is between 1/4 and 1/2 full. That is when a delivery should occur. When I received a delivery yesterday for 96 gallons, I needed to call them. They said that it takes 3 years to see what my usage is and then deliveries will be spaced out better. I told them that I no longer want automatic delivery and I will call when I need oil. They said that they could not take the account off of automatic. I told them that I had no problem with automatic delivery, but I do have a problem with automatic payment. They said they would review this with the supervisor and the deliveries will be spaced out longer. Next year, I am sure I will no longer be with this company.

Move it Along

I woke up to snow this morning. The newscast said it would come, but I hoped it would pass. We both got our way. It did snow, but it turned to slush. I am done with winter. It is time to move on to spring. Even though the winter was not too bad, I need to see the flowers and warm weather. There are so many good things happening in the next few months and I want them now!

Marionettes

I never liked clowns. You are either a clown person or not. I find them eerie and disturbing. When I visit my parents, we go to a Hungarian restaurant that has a different type of food than we usually eat. Lots of heavy fried food. It is the kind of place you visit once a year. You need the rest of the year to allow the cholesterol to drain from your arteries. This restaurant is full of antiques and a lot of bric-a-brac. The kind you find in someone's home. Most of the decorations are unrelated, but they must have a meaning to the owner. The one place I avoid when I eat there is the bathroom. It is downright scary. As soon as you open the door, a marionette on a string comes flying towards you. If this is the first time you have been to the restaurant, it is scary. It is as if a witch is trying to attack you. The rest of the bathroom is filled with clown puppets. Even in the stall. You feel like you are being watched. Who knows, maybe you are.

Abundance

The only word for last night's wedding was abundance. From the cocktail hour to the main entree to the deserts. Over the years I have changed my "wedding game plan". At the cocktail hour, I do a stroll by first and make my choices on the second go round. I only take one piece of each item and move on to the next station. The third round is reserved for the items I enjoyed most. By this time I am halfway full, so I know it is time to step away. For the main meal, I always eat the salad. It helps with intestinal matters the next day. This is a proactive move. When the entree arrives, I taste it by only having 2 medium size bites. Dessert will be 2 fork fulls of anything that looks good and one cup of coffee. If wonderful looking cookies come out, they will be wrapped in a napkin for further use. When I go to sleep at night, I need to have space in my stomach to lie down comfortably. I give myself an A+ for last night.

Wedding Bells

Tonight I will be attending a wedding. My friend's son is getting married. I know him since he is two, but I don't know him at all. Some kids are just that way. I can't wait until the wedding. It is being held where my niece was married and the food is fantastic. Some people use the expression "to die for" but if I died I would miss the Viennese table. I want to live and eat until I am just about full. When my niece was married, we were too excited to fully enjoy the meal. Now, I will relax and take it all in. Literally.

Bump in the Road

I was traveling into Manhattan via the Brooklyn Queens Expressway aka the BQE. It is a major road that links Long Island to Brooklyn and Queens through the Manhattan Bridge and the Brooklyn Bridge. It has been many years since I have been on such a broken up bumpy road. There were continuous pot holes and bits of asphalt strewn about. I think I even saw a piece of wood inserted into a few pot holes. The road looked like it had been in disrepair for years. Then I began to think about a story I heard on the news last week. It seems that New York  City's Mayor Bloomberg wants to pass a law limiting consumption of sugary drinks to 16 ounces. He wants the 20 ounce size banned. Instead of wasting his time on soda, maybe he should take a ride on one of his highways and concentrate on a plan for it's repair. He really doesn't need to limit soda to 16 ounces. All he has to do is let people drink as much as they want and then make them drive on the BQE. Most of the drink will be regurgitated after the harrowing ride.

New Places

This morning I will be lecturing in the Lower East Side of Manhattan. I have never been to this particular area before. I have never even heard of the neighborhood. For some reason they chose 10:30 am for my lectures but I do not know who will be attending. It seems like a rather early time to have a class. The only people that could possibly come would be the unemployed or stay at home mothers. I am curious as to what will be. I am booked there for 4 times. Maybe I will be pleasantly surprised.

In Our Core

Last night I taught the second of a three series class in Syosset. When I first signed on to do it, I had wanted a one hour slot, as I do in the libraries. The school asked for 90 minutes. I agreed to that and hoped that I would be able to hold the student's attention for that long. As it turned out, for the past two weeks, we have stayed for almost two hours. The same thing has been happening at the libraries. I learned a very important thing. We are all the same, in our core. The faces change but the issues remain constant. We all have the need to be heard. We all have the need to grow. We all have desires that have not been fulfilled yet. No matter how old we are, the need to be the best person we can be, still holds strong.

Tough Pill To Swallow

My husband has IBS, a stomach condition that can be annoying and painful. He has been on a medication that has it under control for 20 years. Last week when I tried to refill the prescription, the insurance company denied it. It was no longer approved on the plan. I called the doctor and asked for a comparable drug and he sent the Rx in the mail. Before I went to the drug store, I called them to see if it was approved by my insurance. It was not. By now, my husband had run out of the medication and was beginning to feel stomach pain again, for the first time in 20 years. I called the insurance plan's pharmacy and had a three way call with customer service, the pharmacist and me. After 2 hours we came up with a medication that was comparable and approved. It was not able to be called or faxed into the drug store, so this morning I will have to drive to the doctor's office and pick it up. What a shame when the insurance plan becomes the doctor.

Two Steps Back

I feel like I have been thrown back into winter. For the past 2 weeks I have been waking up to sunlight. Then we had to change the clocks back. Now, I am getting ready to leave my house, in the dark. When I awaken to sunshine, I get up(!) and get out of bed(!) and go to work (!). When I awaken to darkness I get upppppppp...get out of bedddddddd, go to workkkkkk. Once again I will need to turn on my headlights when I drive. I will now begin the morning countdown until "I see the light".

City Life

I have begun lecturing in Manhattan. The lectures are held on the upper west side and lower east side. I am not a city girl so commuting there was a big deal. I usually map quest three ways and chose the one I think is best. The first time I chose the wrong one. It took an hour and a half to go 30 miles in stop and go traffic. The only good part was that the parking was not as bad as I had anticipated. I had an hour to spare and walked a few blocks, looking at menus in the restaurant windows. The prices were outrageous. Eleven dollars for a BLT sandwich. That must have come from a very fancy pig. The libraries in Manhattan are packed, not a seat to be had. The children's sections have so many kids I could not even count. It is a different feeling being in the city. A different pace. The lectures are going well and I am looking forward to the rest of the series.

Shifting Gears

I have been driving a car since I am 17 years old. I have been a passenger in cars forever. There is one major difference between how men and women drive. It revolves around the gear shift. When women drive and the light goes from yellow to red, we put our foot on the brake and slow down until we stop. Some men have a whole different ritual. They slow to a stop and then shift the car into neutral. Some even go further by engaging the emergency brake. When the light turns green, women put their foot on the gas and go. Men need to un-engage the emergency brake, shift into drive and then they go. I first noticed this way of driving, years ago, when my father-in-law did it. He believed it would extend his brake life. It didn't. Next I saw it with my husband. Lately I have noticed it with other people. Maybe men are fantasizing about the Indianapolis 500. That is the difference between men and women. We like to get tp the point in the most efficient way. They like to spin their wheels.

A Day Late

This morning I woke up to snow. This must be the storm that was being tracked three days ago. The weatherman were only two days off. Maybe their Doppler system needed a new battery. For once things worked in my favor. Since I rescheduled my Thursday lectures, I was able to go to work yesterday and now I have my usual Friday off. I do not have to worry about whether or not I can make it up the hill on Community Drive, to get to my office. I can relax and go about my usual Friday errands and I might even enjoy the beauty of the snow.

Weather or Not

I should be getting ready to go to Manhattan now. I am not. This is because of the erroneous weather reports that I have been hearing for the past 2 days. It was almost like Chicken Little  running around telling everyone that the sky was falling. All I had been hearing was, "A Nor'Easter was a'commin" and we should all get ready for it. One station said 3-5 inches of snow. The other said 4-6 inches and the third said 1-2 inches. I decided that I would reschedule 2 lectures until April 5th because I did not want to cancel at the last moment. I had to call 2 librarians, the head of programing and the department that is in charge of the contracts. The calls were then followed up by emails. When I awoke this morning, I looked out of my bedroom window and saw.....nothing. The sky had not fallen overnight. I could have gone to Manhattan and lectured. So now I am getting ready to go to work where I am not expected to be. Next time I will go with my instincts and hope for the best.

Picture Perfect

I have been seeing commercials for a new McDonald's sandwich and it looked so good. It was a hamburger with cheddar cheese and grilled onions. Yesterday I decided to go and get it. As I ordered it, I looked up and saw the picture of what this delicious lunch would look like. When I opened up the paper wrapping, I saw a sad looking hamburger bun staring at me. I opened it up and saw a tiny, flat, meat patty sitting off to the side of the bun, looking like it was trying to escape. There was a dot of grilled onion. Picture one tiny onion strand chopped up into 4 pieces. I was tempted to bring it back to the counter and ask where the hamburger in the picture was, but we all know that it was in the photography studio. I ate the hamburger and it was very tasty, but not picture perfect.

They Way To Our Hearts

They say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. That is also the way to a doctor's office. We are having a luncheon today. It is being hosted by a treatment center from Missouri. They called me a few weeks ago and said they were in New York and wanted to come and talk about their center. Since my director was out of town, I did not want to set anything up. I told them to send us brochures and I would let the doctors know. I added that the first Tuesday in March would have been good, but the rep was flying home at the end of the week. A week later they called again and said they would fly the rep out to my office to host a luncheon, anyway. I said that would be great. So, at noon today, a rep from Missouri will come to my office and bring in lunch for us. It is a great marketing tool as the doctors will all be very attentive when they have full stomachs.

Double Keys

I returned from the chill of Florida to the chill of  New York. Back to my usual routine. I love to travel but I love to come home. This trip, we rented a car to make it easier for my parents and eliminate them picking us up and dropping us off at the airport. I do not understand why the rental car companies do certain things. When we picked up the car, they handed us the car keys. There were 2 keys on a keychain. We drove away and when we arrived at my parents house we wanted to separate the keys just in case we lost one. That's what people do. They have a spare key, in case of emergencies. As we took a closer look at the key chain, we noticed  that  the ring was soldered closed. There was no way to separate the two keys. If you lost one, you lost both. Does that make sense?

Un F-air Bed

I am going back to New York this morning and I haven't slept all night. It was not because of the excitement of traveling. It was because of the airbed I slept on. As most children of Floridians know, when you come to visit, you have two sleeping choices. The first is on the sleepsofa where you will have a bar digging into your back all night. The second is an air mattress, which is usually the better of the two scenarios. Not last night. Airbeds have quilted areas in them. It must be designed that way for a reason. Last night, every few minutes, a quilt popped open, like a kernal of popcorn. The bed formed a "U" shape, which, by the way, is not compatable with the human spine. So I curled up in the fetal position and prayed for morning. The time ticked away slowly until 7am, when I got up. I hope the plane ride is smooth so I can sleep.

Collect Calls

I have been out of town since Wednesday but have talked to my family at home every day. Years ago, when you went away, it was too expensive to make out of town calls. People wrote postcards letting their families know how they were doing. A few months ago, I found a few of them from my grandmother. She and my grandfather were in Miami for two weeks and she wrote home every day. I vividly remember when I traveled on vacation with my friends in the 70's, the method of communication we all used. It was the collect call. You called the operator and she rang your phone at home. The trick was that you asked for yourself and the person on the other end of the line would then know that you were safely at your destination. You tried to get as much information across as possible. The conversation went something like this:

• Operator: I have a collect call from Shelby.
• Parents:Shelby isn't home now.
• Me:Shelby must be in Florida.
• Parents:I think she is at the hotel.
• Me: She must be and I bet it is sunny and warm there.
• Parents:I will tell her you called.

That was the code for, "I am here, in the hotel and the weather is beautiful".

Now, we text, call, Skype, Facetime and email. No one is really on vacation.

Shhhhhhh

 I am in Florida since Wednesday morning. We took an early flight so we could have the entire day here. The flight was at 7am and left on time. It was a quiet, uneventful flight until we went to the bathroom. My sister and I walked to the restrooms at the same time but I returned to my seat first. As she was sitting down, she commented that the bathroom floor was sticky. I said the floor in my bathroom was also sticky. That is when it happened...we were shhhh'd. The lady sitting ahead of us turned her head backwards and said "shhh". Was she for real? Shhhing us for talking on an airplane at 9am? We were not screaming. We only said 5 words in a normal tone. From that point on it was "game on". I read my Readers Digest article aloud to my sister, making sure to laugh loudly at the jokes. We also flipped the tray in front of me up and down 2 times, giving it an extra "zetz" upon closing it. The woman never looked back. She must have been afraid of us. Upon exiting the plane, she ran so fast, as she pulled her carry on suitcase, that the wheels got caught and she tripped. I guess "shhhhsing" can be hazardous to your health.